Keep Your Head Up *Ethan Dolan*

5

~ Raina ~

          Once I get home from school, I unlock the front door and enter my house, locking the doors behind me and then I head upstairs to my bedroom and straight to the bathroom.
So many people were rude to me in the hallways today and I didn't know what to do. I wish I could somehow make them all stop and make them all realize just how much this affects me. If I could that, then I would make them pay for making me feel shitty like this.
I strip my clothes off and climb into the shower. I grab my blade and cut a few more slits in my wrists, being careful not to cut too deep like last night. I watch as the blood flows down my wrists and down the drain.
I wish the people at school understood what it felt like to be bullied, beaten and harassed every day of the school year. Maybe just maybe, they'd stop doing this to me and then I could be happy again.
But happiness is overrated, apparently, in this horrible world I live in.

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

After my shower/ cut session, I climb out and wrap a towel around my body. I head back into my room in search of clothes to wear. I decide upon another oversized hoodie and a pair of sweatpants. I lay in bed attempting to watch tv for a while but I can't concentrate so I give up. I check the time and see it's around 4:30. I should probably figure out what I want to eat tonight for supper since I'm all alone.....
I head downstairs, phone in hand, and look around on the counter for the list of phone numbers for all the delivery food places in a 20 mile radius. I decide upon ordering my favorite Jimmy John's sandwich- the Big John- some BBQ Jimmy's Chips and a Cherry Coke. I head back upstairs and grab some of the money my parents gave me to use while they're on their little "trip" to pay for my meal. It arrives a couple minutes later and I had the guy my money and tell him to keep the change which is like $5. I thank him for the food and he thanks me for the tip and then he leaves and I shut the front door and lock it again.
I take my food to the kitchen and sit at the island enjoying my dinner.
After I'm done eating, I decide to do my homework since I honestly have nothing else to do with my life. I have no friends and my parents are gone. I really don't have ANYTHING to do or ANYONE to talk too. It's not like anyone cares enough about me anyways to talk to me or be my friend so who am I kidding anyways?
Homework takes me from 6:30 till 11:30. After I'm done with my homework, I pack it all back up into my backpack and then I head upstairs to get ready for bed.
I take out my contacts and put on my glasses, staring at myself in the mirror in disgust. I wish I were prettier like everyone keeps telling me. Maybe if I were prettier then I would have more friends.... But I doubt that will ever happen. After I take out my contacts, I brush my teeth and put in my retainers and head into my room to go to bed. I pull the covers back and fall into a deep sleep.
I wish my life were easier, but I know it never will be. No matter what I'll always be sad and depressed and there's nothing I can do about that.

A/N i hope you guys are enjoying this story so far! i know Audiya does :)

-GraysonBaeDolan <3