Perrie POV
When I get home I throw myself down on the bed and lay my face into the pillows. I cry, not even worried about if my makeup was going to get all over my pillows.
Why did I think that? Why did that even come to my mind. I'm so stupid for even thinking something good like that could happen.
I'm not made at her I'm mad at myself for thinking that. I went there hoping to at least be on speaking terms but I never do anything right. I got my hopes up. Something I shouldn't of done. In the end I just hurt myself.
I sit up and use my sleeves to whipe my tears away but they kept coming down. I haven't seen her in so long and this is what happens. This is what I do. I'm so embarrassed that I showed up with that mind set.
She was doing the right thing by telling me what Zayn was doing but I wasn't stupid, I've known for a while that Zayn was an unfaithful piece of shit but I didn't want to believe it because it was me who came back to him. It was me that cheated on Jade with this dog.
I don't want to be with him, I want to be with Jade and I wanted this to be the start of us working on it. The start of changes.
Going back to Zayn I realize that I dont need to care about what my family thinks, or what society thinks. I don't need to care, I only needed to care about Jade and the friendships I made. They were my family and it was all I needed except now I have nobody but myself. My mums an absolute bitch who probably cares that Zayn is more around than anything. Maybe I could just set them up.
And Zayn. Zayn is an egotistical ass hole who feels he needs to keep me around just to feel like he's won.
This isn't a game though. My feelings aren't a game and neither are Jade's except I played Jade and now Zayn is playing me. I don't need him I really don't.
I take my phone out of my pocket and let Zayn know that when he gets home we need to talk. I'm getting to the point where I can't take things anymore. I'm gonna flip out if I stay here with him.
If I can't get things right with Jade right now, I can leave him and get things right with myself first.
Jade's POV
I drive home silently. I felt so bad. I didn't want her to think any of that. I honestly thought that she wouldn't because, in my head I assumed her and Zayn were okay. I guess I shouldn't just assume things like that. I feel I was wrong for bringing her to talk now.
When I get home, I get out and slowly walk in the house. I close the door behind me and lean against it as I take a deep breath.
"Rough day?" Jonas says walking out of the kitchen and in front of me.
"You don't even know" I sigh
"Wanna talk over some muffins?" He ask. I smile and nod my head. Jonas always makes muffins at the right time, when you really need to just forget and have a mouth full of a fresh baked muffin.
I sit at the island in the kitchen and Jonas hands me a plate with a muffin on it.
"What's wrong J?"
"I went to see Perrie today?" I say and his eyes widened. I kinda expected that look from him though.
"Don't give me that look Jo" I sigh as I take a bite of my muffin. It warmed me up inside and I sigh happily.
"I'm sorry I just, I didn't know you guys were on speaking terms, and it's been so long"
"I know" I chuckle. "I went to tell her that we saw Zayn with that other girl because, I thought it would be the right thing to do"
"Well it is....what happened then, you don't seem to relieved."
"I'm not, when I got there, it felt weird, like for some reason I was happy to see her" I explain and he nods his head letting me know I should go on.
"She looked good Jonas, like really good" I say and we both smile "We talked for about a minuet and then I told her about her we saw Zayn, she wasn't shocked because, she already knew."
"What?" Jonas asked all surprised and I nod my head agreeing with him. "She knew and she's still with the dick?"
"That's what I was wondering. She then got upset because she thought I brought her there to try and work things out or at least try to be friends"
"You're shitting me!?" He says surprised with his.mouth full of his muffin. I laugh and nod my head at his expression.
"I tried to tell her that it wasn't like that and then she left, Jonas I feel really bad about it" I sigh
"Well" he says sympathetically. "Do you still care for her?" He asks
"Of course I do"
"Do you still love her?"
Love? I knew that I was still in love with this girl but I don't want to admit it. I don't want to admit it to myself more but, I know its true and its killing me inside.
"Yes" I sigh "Jonas what do I do?" I groan feeling my eyes start to water. I was so confused.
"The truth?" He asked
"Nothing but" I say and sniffle a bit.
"Look about ninety percent of my family would have probably wanted to kill Perrie but, that's because I'm Italian and our families are like that but I'm that one percent that actually cares" he says and we both chuckle.
"What does that have to do with anything Jonas" I say laughing as I whipe some tears away as well.
"It means" he chuckles "That to me you should go talk to her, I'm not saying that you guys should get back together but, I'm saying that you guys should at least talk and tell each other how you're feeling because, while you're crying to me, Perrie is crying to herself, meaning you're both crying over the same thing most likely"
"You think?" I sniffle and he just nods his head. I take another bite of my muffin and nod my head.
"You're right, I'll talk to her" I say and finish my muffin "Thank you Jonas, for the muffin, and talking to me"
"I've always got your back Jade, you're family to me"
I smile as I hop off the stool and head upstairs to my room. I decided that I'm going to call Perrie and try to talk to her again. I want to get everything sorted out right, just trying to enjoy being home. Even if I have to run back to my past for a second to be happy in the present I will.
How was this chapter?
