Hazy Nights

May 2, 2015 12:45 PM

Today I spent the evening at my sisters house with my best friend Madyson Logan. She has been my best friend since the fifth grade and I don't know what I'd do without her. When I'm lonely she's there. When I feel like I'm going to cry, she's there. When I want to kill myself, she's there. She is always there for me. I love her with all my heart.

Sadly, Maddie had lost her mother in early December of the year prior, 2014. Her mother, Lenora Logan, had a seizure and began bleeding from the back of her brain stem. The doctors said there was nothing they could do. The first thing Maddie did was call me, we cried on the phone together, we screamed together, and we pleaded for our beloved mother to stay with us. Unfortunately, it was her time.

Maddie and I miss her so much.

Madyson is the spitting image of her mother. She is just as kind hearted, just as beautiful, and just as lovely in general as her mother. Whenever I look at Maddie, I think of mom.

Oh, how I wish mom were here now. I need her so badly. I find it kind of sad how I consider her more of a mother than my mother. Lenora would always feed me when I was hungry. She would take care of me not because she had to, but because she wanted to, out of the kindness of her heart. My mother would force me to starve myself so that I could lose weight. She would constantly tell me that I was fat and how ugly I was. As for my father, he just kind of sat there and watched as everything unfolded.

I'm quite sad. I think about Mama Logan all the time and I miss her more than anything. She'd know what to do about my boyfriend treating me poorly, him trying to change me. She'd say something like, "Well, Spring, if the boy really loved you, he wouldn't want to change anything about you, no matter how much he doesn't like it. Besides, it's not his life to choose how you should live it." God, I miss her.