𝕿𝖗𝖊𝖒𝖔𝖗 - ʳᵉᵍᵘˡᵘˢ ᵇˡᵃᶜᵏ

Chapter 37: Clair De Lune

[ April 15th, 1978 ]

     THEONA HAD a plan. It wasn't a complicated plan, nor a very well thought out one, but it should've been relatively easy to pull off. The hitch was, Theona also had a problem; she was a stage-four, capital 'S', Scaredy cat (terminal diagnosis).

That morning, while staring herself down in the mirror, she boldly proclaimed, "I'll tell him today."

Her eyes were determined, held narrowed and sharp under the weight of her crinkled brow. She was going to do it. She had all the confidence in the world.

"Sure, you will," Sybill drawled, lazily flipping a page in her book. And just like that, poof, confidence gone.

Theona groaned, throwing her head back unceremoniously, "would it kill you to support me?"

     "After all the whinging you've done this last week? You're lucky I haven't spelled your mouth shut," Sybill huffed, snapping her book shut and tossing it to the side, "I mean, come on, Theo. Everyday you say you're going to confess your deep, dark feelings for Regulus, and everyday you chicken out. Just rip the bandaid off."

As blunt as she was being, Sybill wasn't exactly wrong. Theona had tried many times over the last week to tell Regulus how she really felt. They would be lying together in his dorm and she would stare at him and think: I like you, I like you, I like you. However, she could never push the words out of her mind and past her lips. They would be sitting together in the Astronomy Tower, looking up at the sky, and she would fantasize about telling him there. It would be so romantic, with the midnight air breezing over them, the stars lighting their faces just so, and she could turn to him and kiss him and tell him all the things he makes her feel. Except, when she tried to make her fantasies a reality, she'd get caught up in his eyes or his hair or his lips and forget all about it entirely.

The fact of the matter was that she was terrified. Terrified of him not feeling the same, of getting rejected, of losing him. She didn't know what she'd do if that were the case.

"That was a little harsh, Billie," Pandora scolded from where she was brushing her hair. It was still slightly pink, though the magic staining it had faded almost entirely in the last month, "But also completely correct. Get it together, Theo."

"You are both awful friends," Theona groaned, throwing herself down stomach-first on her bed. "It's Saturday, A.K.A. Regulus day. That has to be good luck."

"I don't think your self-imposed friend schedule contributes to luck," Sybill snorted, "speaking of, you need to calm down with that. You're going to burn yourself out."

"I think the schedule is the only thing holding me together," Theona refuted, "if I let myself be alone, I'll start thing about my issues with Sirius, or Sebastian getting killed in battle, or Eve... just existing, or the other one hundred and ten things I'm trying to avoid."

"Right, so I'm just going to assume you're hearing how mad you are and not say anything," Sybill scoffed, rubbing her face, "go back to complaining about Regulus, it was less depressing somehow."

     "What's got you in such a mood?" Theona grumbled, flipping onto her back.

     Sybill sighed, glaring daggers at the ceiling, "Pete canceled our Hogsmeade date 'cause he and the boys have 'something big planned,' which I can only assumes is some sort of prank. Honestly, Theo, boyfriends aren't worth it. Go back to dating women and save yourself the trouble."