An Angel's Tears

A Day I'll Never Forget

The day started off just as usual: girls gossiping in the halls about the latest drama. There was also the occasional stare and murmur about my arrival... and to think I was invisible. The guys were either eyeing me with a uninterested expression, or looking at me like I was from another planet. As soon as I walked through the door, I was greeted by the feeling that told me I would be alone again this year, I had no friends and I haven't had any since...ever.

I was looking down at my feet as I passed the people crowding the halls, and with a sigh headed to my locker. Now, some of you may think school can be exciting and a good place to meet friends, but for me, it's Hell. Boring teachers, boring subjects, stuffy classrooms, annoying classmates, menacing bullies, hurtful gossip.... Need I go on? But I guess I got a little lost in thought as I was walking because the next thing I knew, I collided into someone.

"Uh sorry, my bad...." I quickly apologized.

I was just about to walk around the person, but their reply made me look up to see their face, "No, it's my bad, I wasn't watching where I was going." And there he was, the very same guy that I sometimes catch staring at me for whatever reason. I was speechless and ended up blushing a little. This I couldn't understand, why was this happening? He's just some guy...maybe a good looking guy but... no. What am I thinking? I'd never have a chance with him anyway. He gave me a small smile and I ended up pushing past him. I don't know if I came off as a little rude, but I didn't care. I just had to get away. After all, I'd embarrassed myself enough.

I walked to my locker, put my stuff into it, and headed to homeroom, which was where I'd stay to have Math first period. Fuck. I hate Math, especially first thing in the morning.

I walked into my class, great... all of the fucking idiots that I hate; this will be an awesome year.... I sat at an empty desk in the back of the room; if I'm going to be invisible 24/7 I might as well help with the process. The teacher didn't even bother to start with an introduction to the topic, she handed out a worksheet and told us to get started. She was a little overweight and her hair was grey, it was cut short so it only barely passed the middle of her ears. She had to be at least 60.

Just as the bell rang, the boy I saw earlier slipped through the door, with a quiet apology to the teacher he took a seat in the back 2 desks away from me...funny how I never realized he'd had this class with me.

He sat there silently without so much as a sigh escaping his lips. As hard as I tried, I couldn't contain my curiosity. I had to look over at him. He was looking at his hands on his desk, his head was slightly bowed, and I could tell he wasn't paying attention to anything. I watched him as he sat there, his dark black hair hanging over his eyes; he had on all black clothes. I wasn't quite sure, but I was guessing he was labeled as emo.

He was thinking about something, and he looked as if he obviously didn't want to be here, possibly just as much as me. I wasn't paying attention to the math teacher's welcome speech; I think her name was Mrs. Malcolm. I was focused so intently on him for some reason, a reason in which I couldn't quite identify....

He looked up from his thoughts, and he immediately met my gaze with his deep blue eyes. He didn't give me a dirty look or look at me like everyone else did. Instead he continued to look at me for another second and then his expressionless face finally broke into another small smile. I began to blush; embarrassed that he caught me looking at him. I'm pretty sure I turned bright red; I looked away quickly, and could have sworn he chuckled at my reaction.

Great, not only was I falling for this boy, -no I refuse to accept that, I don't fall in love!- but I didn't even know who he was or his name. And now, I blew a perfectly good first impression by blushing so red. He must think I'm weird, like all the others, and how the hell could I ever believe that I was worth it in the first place?

The rest of class passed uneventfully, and I tried to listen to Mrs. Malcolm (I saw it written on the board half way through class). He didn't look at me the rest of the class, and I didn't look at him either, I would just blush again anyway....