Zephyr | Lee Felix

Chapter 29

SUNDAY, WEEK 6

And... that's done.

Eugene clicks the submit button and heaves out the biggest sigh ever. There's no better feeling than submitting an assignment that has been weighing her mind for the past few weeks with full confidence.

At some point, it was difficult for her to focus. But thanks to Hyunjin's presence, she was able to get a lot of things done yesterday.

Is he okay though?  She wonders, remembering how he felt so vulnerable in front of her. For someone who is surrounded by a lot of people, she could feel the loneliness residing within him when he hugged her. No matter the number of people, no one can ever make him feel seen.

Her heart empathizes with him, but she isn't sure if he'll open up to her like that the next time they see each other again. She smells the hesitation, the walls that are slowly rebuilding to protect him.

"And now..." Eugene taps her phone, looking at the stagnant chat between Felix and her. The last time they chatted was the day they met at the library coincidentally, where Felix made sure she got home safely.

After that... nothing comes. It seems like the male didn't realise what he had uttered in his half-asleep state, even though it shook her to the core. Even if it wasn't a concrete sentence like 'I like you', one isn't dumb enough to simply brush off that one, impactful word.

Yet.

Yet.

Yet.

The word rings in her head like a siren during an emergency. Something that seemed to haunt her mind for so long, even though she managed to push it to the back of her head every time she forced herself to focus on her assignment.

But now, it's resurfacing again and replaying in her head like a broken CD. An alarming reminder of the shift in Felix's feelings towards her. And there she is, still confused about her feelings for him.

It started off okay. She has expressed her interest in him in a playful manner, but the moment at the tram stop changed everything. It isn't just interest anymore, she's intrigued. Yet as intrigued as she is, the idea of being so vulnerable and open in front of him doesn't feel too familiar.

The last time she was vulnerable to Christopher, it was a bit too much of a burden for him. Yet Eugene understands it very well—with so many things to handle, it's only natural that Chris will eventually get overwhelmed by her needs too.

"That's an unhealthy way of thinking though. If he wanted to, he would." Her mother's voice rings in her mind, disapproving of the route Chris has gone down. It's the same fear that she has for Felix.

If she's ever vulnerable and starts depending on him—will he walk away? Is he able to handle her at all?

A difference is that Felix's schedule isn't as jarring as Chris'. And the way he responded to her story about being bullied was anything but caring and loving.

But will he get sick of me for complaining about the same thing...?

Some people are just not used to hearing traumas, and Chris is one of them. When they started dating in their first year of university, Eugene had just gotten out of high school—the memories of her bullying were still fresh and new. She needed a lot of support, but with Chris' hectic schedule, sometimes she'd feel neglected, even though, it's unintentional.

Dating someone who just had a trauma inflicted on her perhaps isn't something Chris has expected either, causing the experience to crumble into pieces. But he has been a good friend—at least that's what Eugene thinks. He has given his best after all. It's not entirely his fault, nor hers.