hobo heart x reader. Perhaps we value each other?

Chapter 18

Despite his cold skin and lethal demeanor, his arms felt impossibly warm around me. His words pulled at my heartstrings, snapping strings I didn't even know were still attached.

When was the last time someone valued me? When was the last time somebody truly cared about me?

Then, the cold reality hit me. A suffocating wave of panic clawed up my throat. Kindness was a weapon. Love was just a cruel, elaborate setup for the inevitable betrayal. He was going to trick me into lowering my guard, and the moment I became too dependent, he would throw me away like garbage—just like my parents did, just like the system did, just like everyone else.

A manic, desperate fear took over. I shook my head violently, using every ounce of strength I had to shove him off of me, terrified of what would happen if I let myself believe him.

"No!" I scrambled off the bed, stumbling backward until the rigid wood of the wall hit my spine. "No, you can't value me! You just can't! Stop lying to me! It's a pointless waste of time to care about someone like me! I-I'm broken, and scarred, a-and just an absolute fucking disaster! You're just going to get sick of me and leave!"

When I looked up at him, he hadn't moved. He just sat there on the edge of the mattress, a heavy look of pity on his face, his sad eyes tracking me like a broken animal.

I looked away from him, wrapping my arms tightly around myself, hyperventilating as the terrifying weight of vulnerability crushed my chest. "And besides... after what happened last time with CC, do you really want to get hurt again? Or are you just waiting to hurt me first?"

"How the hell do you know about her?" His voice dropped, suddenly tainted with a sharp mix of shock and low-burning anger.

I looked back up. His crystal-blue eyes were glittering with tears. Even after all these centuries, that name was a jagged blade in his throat. The sudden flash of his anger made my stomach drop with pure terror; I braced myself, expecting a blow that never came. "I read about it in Marcy's journal," I whispered, the fear of my own big mouth making me physically shrink against the wall. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up. Please don't hate me."

He shook his head, letting out a long, ragged sigh that seemed to drain the anger right out of him. "Then you should also know there is a major difference between you and her." He slid off the bed, his boots quiet against the floorboards as he walked toward me.

"What's that?" I whimpered, dropping my gaze to my feet, my mind screaming at me to run, to lock the door, to hide before the trap snapped shut.

He didn't let me hide. He placed one hand flat on the wall next to my head, and used the other to gently catch my chin. He tilted my face upward until our eyes locked. He was so close I could feel his cool breath ghosting over my cheeks. His vivid blue eyes were drowning in emotion, like swimming in a freezing, endless ocean. The stark white skull pattern painted across his flesh slowly flushed pink as he closed the remaining distance between us.

"She didn't give me her heart."

Before I could even process the words, his lips connected with mine. The sudden, freezing sensation sent a violent shiver straight down my spine. But his kiss wasn't rough. His lips were infinitely softer than I ever could have expected from a monster. Instinctively, I slammed my hands against his chest to shove him away, terrified that giving in meant giving him total power to destroy me later—but my arms went completely weak, the fight draining out of my muscles. I resisted for one desperate, panicked heartbeat, and then the overwhelming need to be held overrode my survival instincts, and I completely gave in.

The hand on my chin slid into the back of my head, his fingers tangling into my jet-black hair to deepen the kiss. The hand on the wall slid down to my waist, his grip firm and possessive as he pulled me flush against his body.