Lexi POV
Alfie? Alfie?! I mean, nothing wrong with that name, but I was expecting him to be, like, Daniel Radcliffe or something.
Me: like... Alfie Deyes?
Alfie 😍💕❤️: nah. Not famous at all ha just Alfie
Me: so if you're not famous, why couldn't you tell me your name?
Alfie 😍💕❤️: I like mystery ;)
Me: wtf
Alfie 😍💕❤️: dum da do da dee
Me: you buttface
Alfie 😍💕❤️: I wonder what it would be like to have a butt for a face...
Me: you couldn't kiss anyone, and when you went #2 you would always have to put your head in the toilet. Also, how would you breathe?
Alfie😍💕❤️: I could kiss by like twitching my buttcheeks (which I guess would just be regular cheeks) And I'd breathe by farting
Me: that's disgusting.
Alfie 😍💕❤️: yeah. Well. I'm a boy.
Me: WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH A N Y T H I N G
Alfie😍💕❤️: E V E R Y T H I N G
ME: shut tf up
Alfie😍💕❤️: make me
Me: and how would you propose I do that?? Kiss you virtually?
Alfie😍💕❤️: yES
Me: *rolls eyes* *kisses you* *burns off lips on stove because ew*
Alfie😍💕❤️: is that how you kiss everyone
Me: no. Just you.
Alfie 😍💕❤️: *cries* 😔
Me: DONT CRY
Me: ILY
Alfie 😍💕❤️: ily too
Me: MY MOM JUST LEFT TO GO SHOPPING YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
Alfie😍💕❤️: you're about to get a crapload of hideous clothes
Me: yes but no. IM HOME ALONE YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY
Alfie😍💕❤️: ...
Me: with nobody to keep me company except...
Alfie😍💕❤️: except who??
Me: Dr. Rubinstein
Alfie😍💕❤️: is this your weird way of telling me you're having sex with your doctor
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAH no.
Me: Dr. Rubinstein is a bear
Alfie😍💕❤️: ...in the mornings?
Me: he's stuffed
Alfie😍💕❤️: is this your weird way of telling me yOU KILLEd DR. RUBINSTEIn
Me: omg no. He's a stuffed bear.
Alfie 😍💕❤️: yOU STUFFED A BEAR??
Me: what you talking 'bout, boy?
Alfie😍💕❤️: murderer
Me: he's like... A teddy bear...
Alfie😍💕❤️: well.
Alfie😍💕❤️: you could've just said so.
Me: I'm done
I heard a noise in the kitchen. "Mom?" I called, to which I received no reply.
YOU ARE READING
Texting Styles / hs
Fanfiction"You're Harry Styles." "Hahaha no. I'm Alfie." °°° Lexi Barnes is sixteen, and if you could sum her up in one word, it would be "normal." Harry Styles is eighteen, and everyone thinks he's a womanizer. One text message will change all of that. ‼️WA...
