"I can't do this anymore" Your voice was weak, it barely made a sound, it was almost like a whisper. Your eyes was on your feet staring at them intensely, trying to avoid his pleading stare.
"Why? Please, tell me why and I'll let you go" Luke said, his voice was wound, sounding vulnerable. You had been together for a year and a half. Everything had gone perfectly, but the last months were pretty tricky. You were so far apart and it felt like for every day that went by he was slipping slowly, but certainly away from your fingertips.
It was his last month of the tour and you had flown out to watch his show, but everything was so different seeing him after so many months of only Skype calls. It was like you didn't really recognize your own boyfriend. Looking at him was like looking at a stranger, a stranger you knew so much about, but yet it felt like you didn't. You just didn't know how much longer you could handle the distance.
"It's just so fucking hard. You're living your life Luke and I'm just sitting at home waiting for you. I don't even know what I'm doing with my life anymore, it's like everything I do is waiting for you. And meeting you after so many months, it feels like a part of me don't know you. " You sighed. Tears were now bawling up in your eyes. You glanced at him for a bit, not daring to look at him for too long, if you did you would probably break down in tears. "A lot happens during a few months Luke, people change during a few months." A teardrop had now began to roll down your cheek, slowly. And you could tell by the look on his face that he was close to crying too, but at the same time he looked pretty mad.
"Don't you think it's hard for me? Do you not think that I spend every day on tour wishing I was home with you? Cause I do Y/N, goddamn it I do every damn day." His voice was desperate, it was like a gentle shout. He was looking at you with an upset look while running his hands through his blond hair, pulling it fiercely.
"It's not easy, being a million miles away from you. But when are things ever easy? But, just because it's not easy won't mean it's not worth fighting for. I just wish you could see that." He sighed and sat down on the couch. His head rested on his knees and his hands were placed on his head. He was breathing heavily, like he was trying to not cry.
You quietly sat down on your knees in front of him, a bit unsure of your next move. After sitting there for a while you grabbed his hands into yours, intertwining them.
"Luke, look at me" You said, pleading. You were looking at him desperately, longing for his loving stare. "Please babe, look at me for one second." As you said so, he did. His eyes were full of tears that still had not spelled yet. You could tell he struggled so hard to keep a straight face.
"I love you, you know I do, but..." You whispered quietly, but he cut you off.
"If you do, you wouldn't leave me" You stared at him in shock, not expecting him to say that.
"Are you seriously doubting my love for you?" You were literally shouting now. Your voice sounded through the whole hotel room, making an echo.
"What do you expect me to Y/N? I don't really get you. What do you want me to think? You're leaving me, so yes I guess I'm doubting my love for you. I believe I have every reason to, cause you're you Y/N"
"What is that supposed to mean?" You questioned. You stared at him with a curious look on your face, waiting for him to answer.
"You fuck with people's feelings y/n . That's what you do, I guess I've just been denying it to myself, cause I didn't want to believe it, but you do" He said, coldly without thinking twice about what he said. The second he realized what he just said, you could tell he regretted it immediately. Still you couldn't believe he had played that card. All your life you've been protecting your own heart, which requires breaking others heart. Every time people got too close, you would do anything to push them away, because you were afraid if they got too close they would be able to break your heart. Luke was the only person you had let in and it took you a lot of time doing so, so for Luke to play that card hurt pretty bad.
"Y/N I didn't..." He started, but you cut him off before he could continue.
"Forget it Luke, it doesn't matter" You said coldly while standing up, turning your back towards him. Then you walked out ignoring the fact that he was shouting your name.
