The Broken~> Narry Au(Slow updates)(boyxboy)

Chapter Two- Afraid

"There's 7 billion 47 million people on the planet and I have the audacity to think I matter."~Anonymous

Waves crash against the lifeless rocks, the sky is a colorless grey; impossibly sad. I can feel the cold bitter wind against my creamy skin. I stay still observing my surroundings as a cancer stick is placed between my lips, the smoke cloud making small shapes. My body shakes craving warmth but I ignore its pleas as I refuse to head back home. I couldn't return home at least. Zayn and I had quite the fight; his words stung more. The venom from his words dripped deep into my flesh burning my being. Yet, I knew he was right I knew I was pathetic for making Harry the blame of my life endangering actions. The tear in my heart wishing to have never heard such vile words escape Zayn's mouth. But I knew he was sick and tiered. Sick of crying because of the amount of drugs and alcohol he finds in my room, sick of arguing, sick of seeing me destroy my body, sick of me sleeping around, sick of me partying, sick of seeing me hurt. Tiered of giving me endless lectures, tiered of dealing with me, tiered of me not listening, tiered of me running away from my problems, but mostly tiered of me hurting others.

I couldn't blame him. I was the poison everyone I loved had to endure; had to suffer through. I was death itself in flesh and blood, but I was killing everyone around me slowly without my knowledge; though I could feel it. The unimaginable pain presented itself in their eyes; eyes that barely had life behind them any more. I knew I was the cause, they had such perfect lives such perfect endings. But they still had to deal with me. My fingers traced over the fresh cuts on my skin, soon I'd be able to make them deep enough to cut a vein; to end the suffering.

My bare feet stand from the damp sand slowly making their way over to the angry ocean. My toes barely touch the freezing water, I could feel my body begging me not to jump into the bitter coldness. I don't listen; my legs running towards the monstrous waves, shoving my entire body. I can feel my flesh burning at the agonizingly cold water. I don't move I can't, my lungs begging for oxygen; I find myself sinking deeper, but I don't struggle. I remain without movement, listening to the waves crash down on my frail figure. I flutter my eyes shut letting the darkness envelope me. Zayn's words repeating in my mind.

"You're pathetic!"

"Why must you cower from your problems?!"

"Have you ever thought maybe Harry isn't the one to blame? Maybe its you Niall."

"I don't blame him for leaving you behind."

I could feel myself dying the pressure on my chest too much to handle. But I'm not dying, I'm greeted by forest green eyes. I sit up quickly only to be laid back down. "Harry?!" I wail.

A small chuckle escapes from his rosy lips. "Did you hit your head on something? Last time I checked my name was Michael."

"You have his eyes."

"I know Ni. But do you want to explain why the hell you tried to drown yourself?!"

Flinching at the volume of his voice, my eyes drop in shame staring at the damp sand beneath us. No words seem to flow out of my trembling lips, making sentences difficult to form. I can feel Michael's eyes burning holes into my flesh; waiting for a response. I can't seem to ever look up at him nor tell him the right words; words he's searching for. I look over his shoulder to the angry waves crashing down trying to find the reason for my motives, but came out blank. "It was never my intention. I simply let the waves eat me alive." I finally managed to speak; voice soft and weak.

Michael picked me up from the damp sand not bothering to answer my reply. My body shivered in his arms as my clothes began to freeze against my body, my lips sure to be turning blue. I buried my face in Michael's neck, listening to how the sound of the waves began to fade with each step he took. Words could barely describe how miserable I felt in that moment; to still feel my heart beat in my chest. To still have emotions, to simply even be breathing. He sets me down in his car buckling me up before he steps to the drivers side. I could see the disappointment and sadness in those ever green eyes, but Michael was never one to express negative emotions. "I'll take you back to Zayn's later for now you're coming with me. And don't think Zayn and Liam won't be hearing about the little stunt you tried to pull." I don't say anything but give a small shrug laying my head against the cool glass window, watching as Michael begins to drive us to his.