Barlowen

Chapter 5

Hello lovely people. Thank you for your continued support for this story. I hope you enjoy this chapter, not loads happening but cute stuff is to come! :)
Anyway, please enjoy this chapter and keep on reading! Share with any other Barlowen shippers you may know. I love to see people enjoying what I write. As always, enjoy!
J x

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*Gary's POV*

"I know it'll be hard, Markie," I sighed. "But then it wouldn't be real," I smiled. Mark gushed before throwing his arms around me.
"If its not hard enough, its not love," I whispered. Suddenly I froze. Did I just indirectly say I loved Mark Owen? It's okay, he probably didn't pick up on it.
"If it doesn't hurt, its not love," Mark added. I sighed in relief at how well that had gone down.
"Yes, or if it doesn't change your life," I added. We looked up at each other before I detached myself from Mark and walked over to my piano.
"I've had an idea, Marko. It fits perfectly," I beamed, grabbing my song book. "I had this melody going that sounded good, but I didn't know what lyrics to write in, but now," I said as he began his tune. "If its not hard enough, if it don't hurt enough, duh duh duuhh, if it don't change your life, then it's not love," Gary sang as I saw Mark rapidly writing down some lyrics in my book. "Has to rhyme with life," I thought.
"If its not hard to find?" he suggested. I loved it.
"Yess! Write it down!" I beamed, singing the chorus again.

We spent about an hour writing that song, and ended up with a really great result at the end which we were more than happy with.

"Sh*t, I forgot the time. I've got to got to lunch with Dawn's parents. Sorry, Marko," I sighed.
"Don't worry, Gaz. I understand," he smiled quite happily. I gave him a tight squeeze and a quick peck, feeling like a school kid again with their first crush.

I ran out of the door, grabbing my belongings on the way. Jumping in the car, I egnited the engine and set off home to pick Dawn up.

I arrived and just beeped instead of going in, not wanting to delay us anymore. "Hi, love," Dawn smiled. I smiled back.
"Alright?" I said.
"Yeah. Your mum just got here to look after the kids," she smiled happily, putting her handbag in the footwell.
"Cool," I said.

The drive was quiet, only the sound of soft radio music playing. I don't think she was bothered, suppose a bit of peace from a day with the kids. I felt slightly guilty at not helping out today or even letting her know I was going to be out, but I really needed to be with Mark. As soon as he popped into my head, he didn't leave for the whole car journey.

We knocked at Dawn's parents' lovely house and waited for them to answer. Her mother opened the door with a wide smile. "Dawn! Gary!" she beamed. We hugged her and entered the house.
"Smells great, what's for lunch?" Dawn asked her mum as he dad took our coats and hung them up. We walked to the dining room.
"Hot pot," her mum replied. I must say, she did make a mean hot pot.

We sat at the table over wine and dinner was served. Everybody was catching up and laughing over the meal. I was quieter than usual, my mind filled with Mark, and if or when I was to tell Dawn the news. I watched her as she laughed with her mother and took another sip of wine. She was so happy. Did I really want to destroy that?

My thoughts pondered back over to Mark. How much he meant to me. How much I missed him already. His smell, his smile. And how much I needed to be with him.

"Gary?" Dawn asked, dragging me back down to reality.
"Uh-yes? Sorry?" I smiled.
"Is everything okay?" her father asked. I smiled at the friendly giant.
"Yes, sir. Just a little tired," I chuckled, before finishing off my serving. I think everyone understood that work must have been stressful at the moment, and decided not to bring it up again. I was grateful for that.

This just gave me more time to ponder over my feelings for Mark. They were becoming stronger and stronger each time I thought of him. What was wrong with me?

*Marks POV*

I'd finally driven myself home and let myself in through the front door. It was quiet and I presumed the kids were asleep. I walked into the living room. "Mark," Emma smiled, getting off the sofa to greet me. She placed her hands on my shoulders and leant to peck me lightly on the lips. Where was that spark?

I sat on the sofa with her as an old movie was playing. I'd never heard it before and it looked rather dull. I didn't like watching films from half way through anyway. Emma cuddled up to me but all I could think about was the warmth I received when Gaz was upset and nuzzled into me, the same way Em was doing.

"Are you not watching this?" Emma asked me.
"Hm? Oh, no not really," I smiled. She reached for the remote and turned off the television. "No, you didn't have to turn it off just because I wasn-" I was cut off by a pair of lips crashing down on mine. It had been a while with me being at work since Em and I did anything. She straddled my hips as I lay there on the sofa.

I didn't know how to conduct myself. I placed my hand on her back while our lips never parted. What was I doing? I felt no excitement or anticipation. If anything, only slightly uncomfortable as my mind wandered to Gary ever few seconds. I had to stop this.

"Em," I breathed between a kiss before she re-planyed her lips onto mine. I pushed her shoulder lightly so we broke contact. "Emma," I said again.
"Yes, Mark? What's wrong?" She panted.
"I'm," I started. "I'm really sorry. I'm just not up for this tonight," I sighed apologetically. She pulled away looking slightly confused.
"Is everything alright?" she asked.
"Yeah. I just have a lot on at the moment. I'm best going to bed," I said before planting a sparkless kiss on her cheek.
"Okay, Hun," she said, lying back on the sofa. I walked up the stairs slowly, hearing the sound of the television turning on again.

I checked on my three little miracles. I loved them to the moon and back, and I wouldn't give them up for anything. If everything with Gary goes through I'll make sure I still see my gorgeous babies.

I sat on the end of the bed and sighed when suddenly I heard my text tone.

"Hi, Mark. Have you told Emma anything yet? G xx" sent @ 8:13pm.

I replied instantly.

"Heya, no. But I turned her down tonight so I think she knows something isn't right. Have you said anything to Dawn? M.O. xx" sent @ 8:14pm.

It took him a while to message back. He was probably driving.

"No, not yet. I don't know how I'm going to tell her. I want you, Mark, but this is hard. G xx" sent @ 8:37pm.

I replied again.

"I know, Gaz. We will find a way. I promise. M.O. xx"

I didn't wait up for another reply before getting off to bed. It had been a long day, and things were only going to get harder.