Constellations | A.I.

17 - comforting

I dedicate each chapter to one specific writer who either inspires my writing and/or has written incredible books. This chapter goes to parahmore because your books are so memorable and creative, and I just love your writing overall. Also, your stories address very serious topics in such a beautiful way, and I love how you write about things from the character with the disorder's point of view, so the readers can see how it is to feel like that.

-Emilie-

"Em, please come over - I'm not okay."

Ashton's heavy, uneven breaths sounded through the phone, and just from hearing the urgency in his voice, I jumped out of bed. I ignored everything about my physical appearance, simply slipping on shoes and rushing out the door. I tried to walk as quickly as I could, but I knew Ashton was crying on the other end of the phone, and all I wanted to do was talk to him and try to calm him down.

"It's alright, Ash. I'm almost there," I said, my own breath unsteady as I picked up my pace, "Just think of last time. Think about what makes you happy again-"

"I need you here. I'm freaking out," He whimpered, and I broke out into a jog as I caught sight of his house.

"I'm here, Ash," I whispered as I dropped to the ground, opening the screen to the basement as quietly as I could, climbing into the house quickly.

Ashton was sitting against the wall, every part of him looking disheveled and broken. I rushed over to him, taking him in my arms immediately and sighing in relief when he nuzzled his face into my neck, his arms wrapping around me.

"I dreamed of him again," He cried against my skin, and I ran my fingers gently through his hair, one hand rubbing his back.

"Try not to think about it. Don't picture that right now. Picture the night. Picture all the stars in the sky, a full moon, a midnight colored sky. Imagine that instead," I murmured into his hair. He mumbled something and pressed against me harder, his chest on my side so I could feel his breathing becoming steadier.

He stayed like that for a little while, his body warm against mine, both of us content with the silence. After about ten minutes, I thought he had fallen asleep, so I moved over a little to lay down.

"Em?"

"Yeah?" I propped myself up on my elbow and looked at him. He rubbed at his tired, red eyes and lazily reached for my hand.

"Can you help me keep my mind off things?" He asked, and I nodded, deciding mentally on what I could do to distract him from his hurt. He slowly got up and I followed, both of us going over to his bed. He sat up against the wall, pulling the blankets up to chin as I slid in next to him. Once I got situated, he pulled the duvet over me too, smiling at me.

"Okay, what's your favorite color? Start off easy," I lightly laughed, waiting for his answer. He chewed on his thumbnail, holding the duvet against his skin as he thought.

"Green, although I really only like wearing white or black," He answered after thinking for a moment and then asked me, "Where do you see yourself three months from now?"

I sighed before answering with, "I don't know, and I don't care to try and think about. I just worry about the present because life is just too unpredictable. You can imagine your future all you want, sure, but if you don't actually follow through with it, then you're disappointed. I think life is more interesting as a surprise," I replied. Ashton stared at me for a few moments before breaking into a grin.