Mod Superhero (Book 6 STUBBING on Oct 27th)

Chapter 6.46 - Priorities

In the demiplane, silence settled between the two men. Emmett felt drained, used up, like a piece of trash about to be thrown away.

Finally, Mod asked, "Are you okay?"

Anger flared anew in Emmett's stomach, but it felt like such a small and pitiful thing compared to the realization moments before, like a candle in a blizzard.

"No, I'm not fucking okay."

Mod said, "We wanted this. You wanted this."

Emmett could barely manage a reply. "Shut up. Just... shut up."

"No. You need to remember why we're doing this."

"You mean why I gave up my life and my body—"

Throughout most of the exchange, Mod's voice had been flat or even sympathetic. But now he snapped.

"No. Remember why we became heroes in the first place!"

Emmett glared at Mod. The pit of anger inside him flared like someone had poured jet fuel on it. He stood, sending the chair across the floor. It crumbled and became part of the room.

"I should've died! Is that what you want to hear? That's why I became a super—the only reason I became a super. I didn't have a goddamn choice then. I didn't have one when Lock almost killed me, and I didn't have one when Savanus was torturing me."

Mod sneered, "Venture made you a super, but you chose to become a hero. Losing your arms and legs, that's on you. You lost them way before getting captured. Just because it happened in a sterile white room and you didn't see it, doesn't mean it didn't happen. You've been giving up things and trading things away this whole time. You kept choosing to be a hero, no matter the cost."

"This time it was too much!"

Emmett's nanite hands were shaking and his heart pounded in his chest. It felt like he was facing down the Menagerie or a horde of fish-men instead of confronting himself. He focused on controlling his breathing.

Ever since Emmett was little, he'd dreamed about becoming a hero... But did he really have a choice? After Dr. Venture saved him on Champion street, could he really have just walked away? Said 'thanks but no thanks'? Could Emmett really have turned his back on the opportunity that he'd dreamed of all his life?

Emmett said quietly, "At first, I wanted to know what happened on Champion street. I was obsessed. I thought that knowing what happened—I thought maybe it would fix something that was broken inside of me. Maybe it would give me a purpose."

Mod replied, "I know. I went back. Traced cell signals and hacked video footage from that night. We never did figure out exactly what happened—"

"I don't give a shit anymore. It doesn't matter." Emmett shook his head. "Knowing what happened doesn't change anything. It doesn't change where I'm at now. What matters is that I thought I had a choice. Now I'm not so sure."

Emmett's gaze softened. "What am I supposed to do now, Mod? You're the upgrade. You have all the answers. You have my life. What am I supposed to do now, die?"

Mod got up with such force that it sent a ripple through the floor. He stepped forward, and for a moment, Emmett thought his doppelgänger was going to attack. Mod's eyes were narrowed. He stopped barely an arms-length away.

"All those times, you chose to keep fighting. Why? You didn't back down against Lock, the Freak Show, the Deep Ones, Golden Boy, Gnosis... Why? You formed the Resistance and kept fighting against the Brotherhood, the Summit, and the Menagerie... Why?"