Fragile Longing (Taekook)

Chapter Twenty Three

Like the leaves in spring,

That fall soft and slow;

You gently touch my heart;

In ways you'll never know.

........................... ........................... ...................

There was a time when Taehyung could've said without any doubt that he doesn't feel anything for that doe eyed stubborn boy who forced his way into his cursed life. There were also times when he could've said that he only feels protective towards his own family.

Just not tonight. When that boy who's eyes shine like a child, were sleeping, while holding onto his arms as if he will vanish anytime, something stirred inside him. Something strange, new, frightening yet...he couldn't run away. Not when he knew that there were pain behind those closed eyes, pain that were tearing him apart too.

"He won't woke up tonight. I have already injected him with anaesthesia." Jin's voice sound distant and cautious as he rearranged the cannula, injecting it in that boy's wrist with ease. Isabella seeing it all from the doorway. Her eyes not believing that the fluff ball she met just a while ago was now looking as if a storm has gone through him.

Though it was harder to tell about which one was in more pain. That sleeping boy or that blank faced man.

Maybe both. Just their way of expressing was different.

A loud ringing of mobile phone distracted Taehyung. Youngi's name flashing on the screen. Along with it, his own consciousness screaming at him too, reminding of places he needed to be.

Yet...yet only those sniffling sounds were entering his ears. Dried tears were the only things he could see, desperate attempt of hiding from the word was all he could remember.

His fingers slowly remove some hairs that has fallen across those closed eyes, fingers sliding towards those cheek, wiping away those remaining tears. The phone kept ringing until it stopped. Thought it didn't seems to have any effect on the blank faced man anymore.

"I...I saw it." A broken whisper left his lips. Jin halted in his place thinking that man was talking to him. But Taehyung was only talking to himself. His foolish irresponsible self. "I thought it wasn't what I was seeing. His fears, his cries, his broken whimpers, I saw it all. I heard it all. But...I never tried to understand it. Never." His hands tightened a little around the boy who seems to be still in pain.

Taehyung's eyes met with Jin. Unshed tears swimming thererefusing to come out. "I thought if I somehow convince myself that this boy..this ...stupid boy...was not my concern. His tears were not mine to wipe away, his fears were not mine to remove, his monsters were not mine to fight....I thought as long as I can convince myself, then it will be ok." Taehyung blinked again and again to not let the anger that were threatening to come out as his tears.

"But it was not. It was not Jin. It was not ok. He was not ok. He never really was." He let go of Jungkook's hand, holding onto his own head, fighting the urge to punish himself. "What have I done, Jin? What have I done?"

"You have done nothing." Jin's voice was firm, posture unwavering as he knelt down beside his friend who seems to be on the verge of breaking down himself. "You have done nothing Kim Taehyung. DO YOU HEAR ME? It is not your fault?"

"Then whose fault it is?" Two darks cold eyes met with jin. "Tell me whose fault it is so that I can beat them, tear them, cut them into pieces until they feel even one ounce of the pain my princess is going thorough. TELL ME WHOSE FAULT IT IS?"

Jin couldn't answer. Nobody can. Taehyung knew it fully. So he have to look for them himself. But right now, he knew that he needed to leave, because his temper was losing, bit by bit, as memories from earlier evening kept coming back. His feet automatically stood up going away from that room, the urge to hit something increasing bit by bit.