Cant Hold On Much Longer

5

It has been two days since we have both been in ICU, and they are going to try and wake us both up at some point today. They say that the quicker they can get us to wake up the easier it will be for us to get used to our bodies again. When the nurses come in they go to Cole first. They check his vitals and make sure he is okay. When they are done checking they slowly remove his wires. I watch from a distance hoping, praying he will wake up but he doesn't. His heart beat becomes a bit slower and his breathing is shallow. They quickly plug him back in and then do another check. Slowly they move away. I walk to Cole, I want to cry but I can't. I lean down and kiss his forehead. I decided I'll be there for him and go when he is fully functioning again.

"Cole you got to do it next time. You have got to wake up. Please. Please wake up. Wake up and I promise you I will try to stay. I promise that I will try. Please. I'm not sure I can hold on much longer if you don't try. You have to try. Please." I whisper. I hear some quiet mumbling and I turn around.

"He seems to still be healing... He is stable but we don't know if he can wake up yet. He will need more time. However she isn't likely to wake up when we try, we were hoping that he would, but we still have to try." A doctor tells everyone I love. I look to my body lying virtually lifeless, it is battered from head to toe.

"I'm not going to wake up, I'm not going to wake up today... I need more time." I tell them even though they can't hear me. Nurses and doctors surround me. They check my vitals like they did with Cole. Then slowly they remove my wires. Pain erupts through my body and I let out a scream. My scream pierces the silence of whatever I am in. Disturbing the peacefulness. I crumble to the floor, unable to move. I want to cry. I want to end this pain. As the thought goes through my head I hear my heart beat get slow. Too slow. Is this time to pick whether I wake up or not? I need more time. The nurses and doctors hustle around me plugging me back in and slowly the pain fades but I can't move from the floor. I let out another frustrated scream. This is bullshit. Feeling my body go back to the numb state I have been in since I woke up in the hospital room. I slam my hand against the floor. I look up praying to a god if there is one. "Why? Why not let me die? Why?" I scream at him. My lungs burn and I find it hard to breathe. What is happening? A bright light shines, blinding me. Is this it? Do I finally die. The background hospital noise fades. Everything becomes quiet. I remember when Cole first kissed me. I had had a breakdown and I had phoned him. He came over straight away and calmed me. He told me that he would fight off death for me. Fight off anything that will hurt me, because it was not my time to die. He had leaned down close to me so we were face to face and then he kissed me. We had been getting close ever since the cliff incident and I had had some feelings for him but I ignored them. The taste of his lips against mine was amazing. I had never had a kiss like that. When we pulled away though we never spoke of it. We acted like friends. That was until he finally asked me out. It wasn't until that date that I realized what it was.

I am brought back to reality and I look around me. The daily hospital buzz is slightly buisier than normal. Three people are surrounding Cole. I walk over and see he has some colour in his face. More than he did yesterday. I want to see his eyes. See what is happening with him. See if he can see me. I want him to see me before I go. I want to say my goodbyes to his face before I go.

"Wake up." I whisper. As if he can hear me his heart monitor picks up a bit and his finger twitches. One of the nurses seem to notice. She runs out the room and comes back a minute later with May and Elliot.

"He moved his finger and that tends to be the first sign of them waking up." The nurse informs them. I look at Cole.

"Wake up." I whisper again, and as I say it his finger moves again.

"Come on Cole." May mumbles biting her finger nails nervously and squeezing Elliot's hand so tight that he knuckles are white but Elliot doesn't say anything. He just watches. Hoping and praying like we all are.

"Wake up." I whisper one last time, and his eyes flutter open. I see his beautiful blue eyes that I have wanted to see since I have got here. They are full of pain and it makes me want to cry, but I can't. He looks around the room with his eyes trying to find something. Then when his eyes find what they are looking for they grow wide. I turn to face what he is looking at. Me. Me still stuck in a coma. Me who I don't think will wake up.

"Lyn?" He whispers using his nickname for me.

"Cole," I reply.