Wayward

Breakdown

I was drying my self after being in the hot tub for an hour when Alilth ran up to me.

" Karson and I are going to find vending machines and head up, you coming?" I shook my head and waved her off.

" You go ahead, I was going to swim laps really quick." She nodded and walked out, Kira and I were the ones who stayed a little longer. The boys ended up leaving earlier than us, I dipped my toe in the cold water and shivered.

" Baby." I glared over at Kira, who was sitting on a lounging chair on her phone. I slowly lowered myself in and dunked my head, I stayed under until I ran out of air and came up. " Haddi, Alilith texted me and said they need help. Wanna come?" I shook my head.

" No thanks, this is really relaxing." Kira stood up and looked at me.

" I will be right back then, don't go anywhere." I nodded and went back under water, it was silent and I felt my body relax a little more. I loved doing this in the water because the only think you ever need to keep track of is your air, it's quiet and I can think. I started doing laps in the pool and felt all the anxiety over the tour wash away, I stopped when my body got tired and pulled myself out of the pool and over to  chair that held my towel. I heard the door open but I kept drying my hair, I didn't here any movement after that so I dropped my towel. I looked over my shoulder and saw Louis standing there watching me with his arms crossed. He had already gone back to their room seeing as he was wearing joggers and a band tee.

" Hey I was just getting out." I grabbed my tee and pulled it on over my head, I grabbed the towel and turned towards Louis. " You going back up to?" He still didn't say anything but he advanced towards me. I raised an eyebrow and took a step back. " Louis?" He smirked and slowed down.

" That's a pretty cute swim suit." I looked down and back at him.

" Thanks, it's old but will do for now." I smiled at him and took another step back.

" And all the boys were looking at you." I slowly nodded and continued backwards. " I didn't really like them looking at you like that though." He stopped walking and put his hands in the pockets of his joggers. " I think you shouldn't wear it again to be honest, unless it's just me." He started towards me again and when I took a step back I felt my foot slip out from under me. I closed my eyes and felt my body falling to the ground, an arm snaked around my waist and another underneath my head and caught me before I hit the ground. I opened my eyes and saw Louis with an angry expression on his face, I am pretty sure worried was mixed into it though. " What were you thinking?" He lowered me to the ground gently and put both his hands on either said of my head. " You could have seriously injured yourself, you need to watch where you are going next time!" I nodded and heard the door open.

" WHAT THE HELL." We both looked over to Kira stomping over to us, Louis hopped up and helped me up. " What. Were. You. Doing." Kira let each word echo through her gritted teeth.

" She slipped walking backwards so I caught her." He smirked at her and walked past her, he turned around and smiled at me. " Remember what I said about the swim suit." He walked out and headed towards the elevators.

" What did he say about the swim suit?" I looked over at her.

" What did he say to you when he hugged you before our performance? You know, when you apologized and everything?" Her face went straight and she sighed.

" He just told me to not get into his way or I will be punished." My face went pale and I laughed awkwardly.

" Get into his way?"" She nodded and started walking towards the door.

" Yeah, I figured he meant you so I was trying to stay by your side at all times." I followed her and laughed.

" Kira he doesn't like me like that, I'm Haddi." She whipped around and shoved her finger into my chest.

" That's exactly why he's doing it, you're Haddi. Innocent and oblivious, and you have this amazing body and that voice. You are the perfect girl Haddi, we all want to be you!" I was taken back by her comment and pushed her hand off of me.

" No, you don't. Trust me, I am not as perfect as I look." I waked past her and into the elevators, she walked in and pushed the top floor.

" Is there something I don't know? Because I think I know your life and it's pretty good." I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms. " Haddi why are you acting like this? I just told you that you were perfect and we all wanted to be you." I glared at her and tried to stop the tears that were coming out.

" Because I am not perfect. I am acting like this because you guys have never asked how I felt, if I was okay!" I wiped the tears falling from my eyes and watched her face drop. " Because I am suppose to be the happy one in the group who doesn't have a problem in the world!" The doors opened and I quickly walked down the hall, Niall come out of the boy's room and saw me.

" Hey Haddi are you alright?" I ignored him and walking into our room, Alilith and Karson saw me and jumped up.

" What happened?" I ignored Karson and walked into my room and slammed the door, I locked it and went into the bathroom. I dropped to my knees in front of the toilet and felt everything come up, I let it all out. By the end my throat was burning and I was crying but I didn't care I wanted it all out, I needed it all out. I let myself sit there for a couple more minutes before grabbing my toothbrush and made sure I got that sick taste out of my mouth. I flushed the toilet and walked into my room to see it dark. I heard the girls talking outside so I sat in front of my door and listened to their conversation.

" It's like she just snapped, I called her perfect and the Haddi I knew was gone." Kira explained to them, that is the reason I snapped. It was the word perfect, it's because I had to be perfect.

" Did she say why?" Alilith's voice broke my thoughts and I closed my eyes.

" All she said was that she had to be the happy one in the group, and that we never asked how she felt." The room went silent and I heard foot steps.

" What's wrong with Haddi?" I heard Harry first, I smiled and mentally thanked him for caring.

" She locked herself into her room and was crying because we called her perfect or something like that." Karson said, I heard more footsteps and felt a knock on the door.

" Haddi?" It was Liam, I breathed out and waited. " Haddi I don't know what happened but we are all here for you." I felt the tears streaming down my face, I wish they were here for me all those other nights at 2 am. When I was alone and needing someone, when I started this whole mess. " Haddi please open the door." I stood up slowly and grabbed the handle, I wiped the tears off my face and opened the door. Zayn, Louis, Niall, and Harry were all standing behind the couches and the girls were in front of them. I looked up at Liam and smiled.

" I'm okay." He looked back at everyone else then back at me.

" Are you sure? Haddi they said you were just crying?" I nodded and smiled even bigger.

" It's just my Dad's birthday so I was a little emotional." Lie. Lie, lie, lie.

" Well you know we are always here for you." I nodded and give him a hug.

" Thanks." He smiled and started walking out, the boys followed all saying their goodnights.

" Haddi you never told us." I looked at Karson and shrugged.

" I forgot, I mean I try to." I yawned and stretched my arms. " I am going to go to bed, night everyone." I smiled at them and closed my door, I sighed as I was in the darkness again; alone.

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Author's Note:

Sorry it's such a short chapter, I have some new things coming up so I won't be able to update much! But thank you guys so much for reading, just remember to vote!

LOVE YOU ALL!