I'm fine. Thanks.

1. Jimmy

'Do you know that moment in the morning, when you wake up and stretch and take a deep breath? Yeah ... It's the only moment of the day when I feel alive. And I hate it.'

Monday. I hate Mondays. I hate every day but Monday I hate even more. Monday means: get out of bed and go see people. In this stupid invetion called High School. That's probably the name because everyone is high as heck all the time. They are because life is stupid. Mondays are especially stupid because I have to go to school right after the weekend where I was in bed all the time. Not the best option but certainly better than seeing people. Needless to say that I don't have any friends. People are stupid anyways.
In the bus. With my earphones plugged in I try to ignore everyone and everything around me. It's my senior year and I don't know why I'm still alive. Seriously. Why haven't I set an end to it? Just one of the many questions I ask myself every day.
The bus stops with screeching tires and staring at my shoes I push out of the door, competing with a mass of brainless bodies that run off right away to smoke some kind of dust.
This monday is especially horrible because it is the first day of the new school year. Somebody pushes me from behind and I stumble. Their evil laughter echoes in my ear. I don't even attempt to look up. Maybe, if they weren't so mean, maybe I wouldn't hate them so much. Maybe I would even be friends with them again. But that's not going to happen. I know it. People will not change as long as they are comfortable. And all the popular kids are comfortable. I know, because I was just like them once. Until my parents died in that stupid planecrash. That's when I started to hate everyone and everything. And since then my life got worse and worse. I lost all my friends and became a nothing. You see, I'm in an abusive relationship with life. It keeps on beating the hell out of me, and I'm to cowardly to leave it. And I hate myself so much for not being able to end it all.

***

I take a seat at my desk. It's in the back and no one wants to sit next to me so I'm there all alone. As usual. I would never ever confess that I'm lonely ... but deep in inside I am.
I start watching the other students push into the door. Most of them are high. With a sigh I turn my head and stare at my desk.

"Stundents!", I hear the pitched voice of my teacher, "We have a new girl. Please welcome Stacy, everyone."
Most people mumble a "Welcome"; I just stay silent and keep on staring at my desk.
Mrs Boyken asks Stacy to tell the class a bit about her. Two seconds later I hear a clear and beautiful sound. I look up. It's Stacy's voice. "Hey everyone", she begins, "As you have heard, I am Stacy. I'm from Atlanta, Georgia and I moved here about two months ago."
"Well why did you move here, to Toronto?", asks Mrs Boyken in return. The question seems to hurt Stacy in some way. I know the others can't see it, but I know that look on a face when you try to keep cool and not let anyone see that you're freaking out inside.
"Different reasons.", is all that Stacy replies. "Okay then" you can see the disappointed on Mrs Boyken's face as she tries to smile. "Where would you like to sit, my dear?" (She always says 'my dear' when she is confused or disappointed).
Stacy's answer comes quickly. "Over there", she says and points her finger to the desk next to me. The entire class freezes. Nobody wants to sit next to me. Seriously. What is she thinking? I mean you can already see that I'm a loner when you just look at me. I mean what?!?
Now Mrs Boyken is completely thrown out of order. "O-okay", she stutters. "H-have a seat next to Jimmy." She tries to smile again but looks more like a sad clown trying to get kids in a hospital to laugh a bit. Stacy nodds and makes her way to the back. All eyes are on her but she doesn't seem to care at all. Why doesn't she turn around, I ask myself, she still can. How insane is she???
She doesn't turn around. A few seconds later she sits right next to me. I am unable to move. I just sit there staring at Mrs Boyken in the front who is writing our new schedule on the board. I should copy it. But again, I am completely unable to move. I finally get to turn my head to look at Stacy. She is copying the schedule in her note book. Then all of a sudden she turns her head to look at me. I should look away. But I can't. She has green eyes and brown, wavy hair. On her nose, some freckles begin to dance as she gives me a smile. I don't smile back. I can't. "Hey", she whispers, "I'm Stacy" "Jimmy", is all I can say. Why does she make me so nervous? "Shouldn't you copy that?" Stacy points at the board. All of a sudden I can move. I pull out my notebook and a pen and start writing as fast as I can. I hear a chuckle next to me. I look up and see Stacy grinning at me. I feel the temperature rising in my face. Why is she laughing at me? Is that why she decided to sit next to me? So she could make fun of my clumsiness? This school year really starts out well...
Why do I even blush? Why do I care all of a sudden. You cared all the time, a voive in my head reminds me, you just never show it. Right. I never show it. So why do I blush now. What is it with this new girl that she throws me completely out of order? My head starts buzzing from all the questions that pop up in my brain so I try to blend them out and concentrate on copying the schedule.

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@MsFiedler here's the rest of the first chapter :)