NIKKI & JOE, CASUALLY | ✓

bonus: did you mean: it gets more awkward

               'Am I gonna have to deal with this for the rest of my life or will they come around on our tenth anniversary? Her mum actually called me a gold digger.'

Caleb bursts into laughter. He collapses out of the frame of our video call so that all I see are his ear and Eilidh at her gaming computer behind him.

'Baby girl, you wish you were a gold digger. Then you wouldn't be so skint.'

He laughs for so long that it infects me too. The barbed vines of my frustration ease their grip and I slacken onto the garden bench, only for the thorns to puncture more of my insides.

'The way they talk about her... It's like they think she's a complete idiot. I'm starting to understand why Cece's always on about with that arson stuff.' I drop my head back to stare at the starless sky. 'Sorry for whinging.'

'Whinge away! I wish I had some advice but Eilidh's parents loved me immediately because I'm perfect, so...'

I grin.

For a moment, I'm content to watch Caleb apply his makeup. He leans back, inspecting himself in the mirror behind his phone. The vanity lighting illuminates him perfectly, whilst, in Joe's parents' back garden for some privacy, I'm mostly in the dark.

'Which one is better?'

He has the same full-coverage aquatic creature face paint on both sides but one is monochromatic in blue while the other has red and pink accents.

'I like the all-blue one,' I say.

'I think so too. The jacket idea I had would've had pink and red detailing but maybe it's a less is more moment.'

'Maybe keep the red under the eye. It's a nice pop. You can keep a bit of red in the outside too.'

His lips flatten as he scrutinises his reflection. Then he nods to agree, and adds some red to the previously all-blue side.

Once it's done, Caleb fixes his attention back onto me. 'Nikki, you're perfect, and you're perfect together. Joe's parents will see it eventually. Tell them that if you were a gold digger, you'd gold dig from me cause I'm your best friend. If you gold dig from Joe before me, I'll actually break up with you. Not even being funny.'

Even my weak chuckle is enough to shake the vines away. I drag in a long breath, then exhale it, and feel lighter than I have since we got to London.

Caleb offers me a smile. 'Let's go on a date when you come back. I'll plan summat nice.'

I agree, thanking him for cheering me up, though of course I can always count on him for that. 'I gotta check in with Cece,' I say. 'That's what I said I were doing.'

Jolting with the realisation that someone could've been listening in on the whole bitching session, my eyes snap to the house. All the windows are empty. Thankfully.

'I love you. See you Monday.'

We end the call and I return to my contacts list to find Cece's. It rings for so long that I'm about to end it and text instead when Cece answers. They're sitting on their bed, the black wall behind them, eyeliner still on though it's getting late.

'Hiya. Thought I'd phone to check how it's going.'

They've stayed in Manchester all summer and, with me here, they're alone at home for a whole weekend for the first time ever.

'I've not set owt on fire.'

Before I can retaliate, a burst of voices echoes into the call over the background music. I arch an eyebrow. 'Have you got people over?'