Keep Quiet (Phan AU)

Chapter 8

Dans P.O.V

I walk through into the door and slip off my shoes, breathing heavily, awaiting the insults and abuse.

I remove my fringe out off my face as already I can feel myself beginning too sweat as the temperature in the room feels like it's beginning too rise.

I shuffle on the spot for a few seconds before entering the lounge and there in the sofa, her body comfortably sprawled out and their sat lovingly beside her is my father.

For once, he doesn't look intimidating or scary, he looks like a normal, happy family dad.

I smile weakly at them both before my mum is rising from the sofa and walking over towards me

"Are you forgetting something dear?" She asks raising an eyebrow.

I bite my lip confusingly and replied with, "N-no what" stuttering a little. She notices how nervous I am before chuckling sweetly and ruffling my hair.

"Tonight's the night off that dinner with my old high school friend"

I groan in frustration and and my dad shoots me a long glare before my body weakens out off fear, at least it gets me away from him for the night.

"Okay" I say quietly and she just clenches her fists together in excitement.

I was not looking forward too this. I may be the the schools most popular boy that receives most off the attention but I am one off the awkwardest teens out there. I am shit at socialising and holding a conversation so I imagine this was going too go fucking great.

--
Phils P.O.V

It's coming towards the evening and I can hear my aunt setting and placing up the table.

It's around 6pm and I'm kind off nervous, I have this gut feeling that maybe things aren't going too go as planned. She's bringing her son that is the same age as me and I'm nervous because it may be a new chance off making friends or he might just reject me like everyone else in my life.

My aunt, for the most off the day has been acting like a completely different person, she's checking up on me every hour or so, convincing me that she loves and cares for me & even brining me irrelevant things up like water and food, even though I'm old enough too make my own.

It was weird getting all this attention and love but I also wasn't really complaining either.

She almost reminds me a little bit off my mother, personality wise.

I sit with my back against the wall in my bedroom with my hands tiredly slapped across over my eyes and I just think about life. Like I do everyday.

But my urges too cut are becoming worse, it's like I always want too hurt myself, inflict pain against myself and it's almost becoming an addiction and I'm worried for myself.

Yet I'm literally full off self hatred.

I stand up, my knees wobbling in the process, also linked with my anxiety but my aunt doesn't know that and she doesn't need too.

I walk through into the bathroom and quickly grab the box off clean and dirty razors from behind the mirror and I then speed walk back into the bedroom. I can't let my aunt know about my guilty pleasure. She probably wouldn't care anyway.

I take a deep breath and slowly but deeply I pierce the sharp blade into my skin and immediately I feel a sense off satisfaction and relief as I smile too myself, the blood dripping from my arm.

I cut some more before I hear my aunt call me from the kitchen, realising that she can come up any minute and catch me, I have no time too clean or put back the razors so I stuff them on top off my wardrobe instead. Hoping she won't notice from the angle she walks in on me from.