ghosts that we knew: A mockingjay fanfiction

Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 5

Katniss

It is colder here than I remember it being. Despite my layers, the chill of the dusty, barren District Twelve winds send shivers up and down my spine. The hair on my arms has rocketed skyward. I stand in the center of my home-well, what used to be my home and is now an incinerated pile of rubble.

Of course, I am not referring to my house in the Victor's Village, which was eerily the only stretch of land that remained untouched by the bombs. I am referring to my home before the Games. I laughed here, I cried here. This is the place where I starved and where I thrived. This is the place where I slunk in the shadows after a long day of hunting. This is the place where Prim and I took our first steps. This is the place where I lost both of my parents. This is the place where I brought Peeta's bread home to my family.

There is nothing left of it but memory now. The Capitol can obliterate the physical evidence that I once lived here, but memory is the one thing that they cannot take from me. So I take that memory and tuck it away, into the corners of my mind where the other snapshots of my life before the Games reside.

It is then that I hear the familiar hissing noises of an old enemy from behind me. I whirl around in shock to encounter Buttercup. My jaw drops.

"How the hell did you survive nuclear warfare?" I ask him incredulously. As if he is pleased by my shock, Buttercup curls his lanky yellow body around my legs and begins to purr. I so badly want to leave him here, and without Prim here to protect him, I can easily get away with this. But as tempting as it sounds, I know that I will never be able to live with the guilt of withholding him from my sister. It will take some more reasoning with Coin to get permission to keep him in Thirteen, but it is worth the extra haggling for my sister's happiness. I begrudgingly pick up the fleabag and the strong scent of dirt and coal mines, of home, floods my nostrils.

"Katniss," a voice in my ear speaks. Haymitch. Coin was afraid I would flee if left alone down here-not that there is anything left for me to run to or from in Twelve-and Haymitch was surprisingly able to reason with her enough to put me on a headphone system. The hovercraft quite literally hovers over me, and I am musing over how I can never truly escape surveillance when Haymitch speaks up again. "You done down there, Sweetheart?"

"I have to pick up a few things," I mutter back as I head in the direction of the village.

The house is fully furnished when I walk through the threshold. For a lingering moment, I can smell the scent of a fresh coat of off-white paint on these walls, but Buttercup is in too desperate need of a bath to be entirely sure.

The air is too creepy to revel in the unwanted memories here, so I decide to move quickly. I dash past the room in which President Snow accosted me over my unconvincing performance shortly after Peeta and I were crowned Victors of the 74th Annual Hunger Games. My hand rests on the bump over my abdomen and I laugh, the sound reverberating off the empty walls with a sickening echo.

"How's this for an 'unconvincing performance', Snow?" I mutter to my invisible audience, arms outstretched and head held high.

I bound up the stairs and move hastily as I weave through the bedrooms, picking up basic necessities. I grab the beautiful hair ribbon that I bought for Prim when we still lived in the Seam and delicately wrap it around Buttercup's neck. From my mother's bed quarters I smuggle her wedding photo, containing the last remaining evidence that she was ever a cheerful woman. I reach my room at the end of the hall. The wedding photo clutched tightly in my hands, I know what I want.

I thrust open the closet door and grab my father's hunting jacket, still in mint condition from when I left it last. I anxiously drop my other belongings onto the bed-Buttercup lets out a startled squeal and extends his razor sharp claw my way-and begin to put the sweet smelling leather back on my body.