Where do we go?

2

Sweat dripped from my face as i touched the end line of the gym, i had lost count a while ago 

"Benson" my coach barked.

 i stopped in my tracks and wiped the perspiration from my forehead with my shirt 

"Drink" he threw a water bottle at my feet

i picked it up and gulped more than half of it

"why are you running yourself so hard before practice anyway?" he asked setting his clipboard down on the bleachers 

i shrugged and readjusted my headband as i moved toward the bench.  

"you alright kid?" his eyes flashed concern

"Yeah im good"

"nothing is wrong at all?"

i shook my head

"you want me to believe your completely recovered" he pushed 

i bit my tongue and sipped from the water again

"you know you used to talked to me benson"

"yeah coach before i got jumped in the fucking walmart parking lot" 

he looked shocked for a minute 

"im sorry" i shook my head again

"i just don't need pity from anyone else, my mom already apologizes for breathing near me now"

he nodded 

"no pity i got it"

i nodded back

"four suicides at the end of practice" he said sternly

i laughed 

"you got it boss" i fake saluted toward him

"so she apologizes for breathing?" he laughed i nodded " the other day she practically bought of the entire store of jc penny because i told her that my jeans were a little short"

he smiled and greeted the rest of the team who were flooding in through the gym doors

___

"Hey sweetie, your plate is in the microwave" i heard my mom yell from the laundry room

i headed straight for my room

"why are you home so late" my moms voice was muffled through the door

i set my gym bag my my bed "late practice" i explained

i layed on my bed and stared up at the ceiling 

five hours of conditioning really does a number on the body i thought as i drifted off to sleep

___

"just run in and get the fucking trash bags Emma" my mom yelled for the fourth time

i groaned and got out of the van taking her card from her and entering the store 

its crazy just how full a grocery store is at 2 am,  

i noticed a particularly attractive guy, about 18. i passed the cereal isle

funny how i say noticed because i didn't see the baseball bat he was carrying in his hand, or really anything he had been wearing,only his shadow as it approached my from behind, and a sudden impact to my wrist

i saw him preparing for another swing of his black and red aluminum slugger and ran in the opposite direction, away from the car, away from help.

unfortunately me being a 14 year old girl at the time, i couldn't out run the man.  

" shh" he sad as if it would calm me as he slipped his hand over my mouth and lifted me up to bring me to a more shadowy spot.  

i felt his hands grip my hips and i squirmed and tried to yell but his yellow hoodie was now muffling the sound of my struggle 

i felt tears threatening to spill from the overwhelming pain of my wrist and i kicked him in the chest, winding him a bit as i could see 

"Emma" i heard my mom shout

he turned around and saw she was walking and searching, no yet seeing me.

"not exactly what i planned" he whispered as he swung the bat once more at my skull this time

"the dizziness didn't stop my flailing

i saw my mom turn and walk toward the store, myself being left unseen, shaking between two dumpsters in the dark.  

i woke up covered in sweat, and my mom opening the door loudly 

"what happened i heard you scream" the panic i her eyes was something id seen way too often lately

" nothing mom im fine it was just a dream" i explained getting up and walking toward the bathroom.  

once i had showered and made my way back to my room. the thought of sleep terrified me even more.  

i looked over at my phone in hopes that you would text me.  eve though i know i couldn't answer, that would ruin you, i selfishly hoped that you would still want me.