Boy Next Door (LeAga)

Manhid n'yo!

Aga has been acting weird since that day we watched the sunset together. He isn't talking to me and would only do if it's about work. After office hours, hindi ko na s'ya mahagilap, napapadalas na rin yung absences n'ya, parang, parang... iniiwasan n'ya ako.

"Aga.. hey." I called him yet he acted like he didn't hear me.

"Hey, are you avoiding me?" I asked him but instead of answering me, he continued searching for something. Ano ba kasing ginawa ko? I can't remember anything I've said or done na pinag-awayan namin.

"Heyyy!" I walked near him, grabbed his arm and made him face me.

"May problem ba tayo? You keep on ignoring me." I said searching for his eyes. I held his chin and lifted his face so that I can look at him in his eyes, those alluring eyes.

"Look at me, Aga. May nagawa ba akong mali? Aga? Kausapin mo naman ako. Heyyy!" Iniwasan na naman n'ya ako.

Sinundan ko s'ya kahit saan s'ya magpunta. Aba! Kailangan kong malaman kung bakit ako iniiwasan ng mahal ko 'no. Yes. You read it right. S'ya yung mahal ko na kumukumpleto sa akin.

And if you'll gonna ask me why I love him, don't expect an answer. Ganun lang siguro talaga 'pag nahulog ka na, hindi ka na hahanap ng rason. That's why it is called destiny. That's why it is called falling in love, you just fell. You didn't force yourself to.

Bigla akong nilingon ni Aga kaya napaatras ako at lalo akong napaatras nang makita ko ang matalim na titig n'ya sa akin. Parang anytime, sasaktan ako nito.

"Ah-Aga, kasi—" kinakabahan ako, ang sama kasi ng tingin n'ya sa akin e. "—may problema ba tayo? Kasi hindi mo—"

"Wala." He cut me off by answering coldly.

"E bakit—"

"Ano ba, Lea! Wala ka bang gagawin? Wala ka bang ibang pepestihin kung hindi ako?! Nakikita mong may ginagawa yung tao e."

Did he just—did Aga just shout on me? Para akong binuhusan ng mainit na tubig. I feel like crying anytime. Ganito pala ang pakiramdam ng sigawan ng mahal mo. Pakiramdam ko, parang sinabi na sa akin ng buong mundo na wala akong kwentang tao. Bakit pakiramdam ko, itinakwil ako ng taong minsang pinaglaban ko at ipinaglaban ako? I felt a tear stream down my left cheek and with that, I ran away. But he didn't bother follow me.

It felt like I am fighting for nothing, para akong lumalaban pero wala naman talagang laban.

----

"Vice, kausapin mo na. Ikaw na ang bahala. Pasensya ka na."

"Aga naman e. Bakit hindi mo suyuin?"

I am talking to Vice right now. I know, nasaktan ko si Lea kanina. Wala namang tao na gustong nasisigawan, especially her. She's not used to being shouted at. Ayoko lang naman kasing umasa pa lalo sa wala. I mean, may mahal na s'yang iba. It's not like I'm giving up, siguro makukuntento na lang ako sa ganito, yung alam kong masaya s'ya kasi may mahal na s'yang iba. Hindi naman ako ganun ka-masokista para ipagsiksikan ko pa ang sarili ko sa kanya, di ba? Sapat na siguro yung sakit na panoorin s'yang magmahal ng iba. In that way, baka sa sobrang sakit, makalimutan ko na ring mahalin s'ya.

"What for, Vice? May mahal ng iba si Lea. There's no use to pursuing the plan. It won't work anyway. How can I have her back if she's someone's now?"

"So isusuko mo na naman s'ya? Ang laki mo ding tanga 'no? Gwapo ka lang talaga. Hahayaan mo na namang mawala ang dapat sa'yo. Aga, memorya lang n'ya ang nawala, bakit pati ikaw sumama? Hinayaan mong kalimutan n'ya yung nararamdaman n'ya para sa'yo, kung nawala nga talaga yun."