Born to Die

18

Alli
"Oh my god, can we please do something? I'm so bored" I groaned to Carl, who shook his head. It's been almost a month now since I got shot, and Hershel still hasn't given me permission to walk around yet. It's so annoying. I've pretty much just been sitting in bed for a month, whenever I absolutely needed to get out of bed I had two options: I could use a pair of crutches, or Carl would carry me.

Either way, I was bored. "You just have to stay off your feet for another month, then we can go back to normal" he told me and I sighed, laying back onto the bed. "Can we at least go outside? I'm fed up with this bed" I complain again and he looks down "sorry, can't do that either" he tells me and I sit up "why not?" "Well it's kinda snowing right now" he spoke quietly.

"You've gotta be kidding me" I put my hand over my face "I'm missing the snow?" I asked and he nodded, I could tell he felt bad, he knew that I loved snow. "Nope, I'm done" I grabbed onto the railing of my bed and pulled myself up, standing on my good leg "come on, sit back down, you'll mess up your leg" he said and I shook my head "I'm not on that leg".

I hopped over to my bag, pulling out a baggy sweatshirt and slipping it on. "What're you doing?" He asked and I started hopping down the cell block on one foot "I'm gonna go see the snow". He ran beside me "I'll help you out, I-" "don't need help, I can do it" I balanced on the wall so I could open the door.

He shrugged and followed me "at least try not to screw up your leg any more" I stopped as we got out of the doorway, snow covered the ground, not much, but there was snow. "I'll do my best" I laughed, taking one hop into the snow before slipping on a patch of ice.

I laughed at myself as I laid on the ground "you okay?" Carl laughed, kneeling beside me and I smiled "yeah, just fine" I said, kissing him. He helped me up, putting my arm over his shoulders "I'm helping you this time" he chuckled and I grinned "fine" I said, letting him lead me through the snow as I focused on keeping my leg above the ground.

"Shit!" Carl laughed, slipping on a patch of ice, falling and bringing me down on top of him. We laughed as we laid in the snow, I was on top of him, my face inches from his. "You're bad at helping me walk" I teased and he grinned "agreed". He kissed me again and I giggled, seeing my breath in the cold air.

"I love you" he smirked and I smiled, laughing a bit as I shook my head "you're an idiot" I told him and he kissed my cheek "but I'm your idiot" "yeah, you are".

I love Carl, I know I do. I just don't feel comfortable saying it, I'm just scared that something will happen and I might lose him. I know that saying "I love you" will just make things a million times harder to deal with, if anything ever did happen. I always just shake my head and smile, then tell him he's an idiot.

He told me that I had said "I love you" once though, when I was in some weird truth serum phase of blood loss, I'd said it. I don't know how much that counts though, I could hardly remember that day after we got back to the prison.

Carl stumbled as he stood up, then pulled me up when he had his balance. "Come on, I wanna look at all the snow" I told him and he laughed "can we just go to the guard tower then?" He suggested, but I shook my head, then thought about it "actually yeah, I think Sarah's up there".

We made our way to the guard tower, trying not to slip on any more ice. I liked being out of bed, this is the most I've moved since I got shot. "So how do you plan on climbing the ladder?" Carl asked and I laughed "like this" I told him, starting to climb the ladder with one leg, it's a lot harder than it looks.

"I'm gonna stay right behind you, in case you lose your balance" Carl said, started to climb and I nodded "thanks". I got up to the top slowly, but I made it there. "Oh hey, I didn't know you were allowed to get out of bed" Sarah smiled and Carl shook his head "she's not". Sarah frowned "Alli, get back in bed. You're just gonna hurt yourself and be in bed longer" she told me and I groaned "I'm fine, I just wanted to see the snow".

  Sarah motioned to the ground below us "well here, it's beautiful" I saw a slight smile cross her face. "Do you remember the last time we were together for a snow day?" I asked her, laughing a bit and she grinned, nodding.

"You took your stepdad's four-wheeler, then towed Tony and I all around town on some boogie boards" she smiled as she spoke "then your rope snapped and you flew off the road" I finished and she put her hand over her face "it hurt dude". I got tired of standing on one foot, so I sat down "I love snow and all, but I can't wait till summer's back" I stated, getting a shrug from Carl.

"Summer gets so hot though, and humid too" he said and I shrugged "well, summer nights are great, no sun so it's not as hot, and the stars are amazing. I miss summer nights" I told them in a bit of a daze. "Yeah, hot summer nights, mid-July, when you and I were forever wild" she said and I laughed, since she was quoting a song "Young and beautiful baby" I grinned at her, naming the song.

"Well, no matter what season it is, I can't wait till I can freaking walk again" I frowned, looking at my leg. There was a bandage around my calf, Hershel wouldn't sew up the wound because of where it was. So, I just have to wait for it to heal on its own.

Carl sat beside me "winter will be over soon, then we'll have a bunch of those summer nights" he wrapped his hand around mine. "We should have a date night when it's summer" I smirked and he grinned back "we can definitely do that".

I looked up at the clouds in the sky, starting to see snowflakes fall again "we should probably head inside" I sighed and Carl nodded, along with Sarah. "Perfect timing, my shift just ended" she said and we started climbing down the ladder, both of them making sure that I wouldn't fall.