Break My Fall •j.b•

8.

Justin

My phone was ringing.
I knew who it would be.
She knew.
I pulled the covers over my head and prayed for sleep to take me. I knew it wouldn't. I hadn't slept a wink last night. My conscience had reared its ugly head. Every time I closed my eyes, the image of Max's hurt face plagued me. Running out on her last night was one of the shittiest things I'd ever done. It was my piss poor attempt at protecting her. The hurt look on her face... I didn't think my opinion of myself could get any lower.
I was wrong.
My phone rang again.
It wouldn't be long now...
The loud hammering noise-and the screaming of my name-was my signal to get out of bed. Goddammit. I trudged down the stairs to the front door. I was in no hurry to deal with her. I inhaled a calming breath and pulled open the door. She stormed in. "You fucking bastard," she spat.
"Hello to you, too, Rachel." I closed the door behind her and leaned against it.
"I heard about your little date night at the movies," she hissed as she glared at me. I nodded. What did she want me to do, lie? There was no fucking point. Her face reddened. "You no good sack of shit. The one girl I tell you not to touch and you can't even do that." She slammed her index finger against my chest.
"What do you want me to say, Rachel?" I asked, moving away from the door. "That I don't want any other girl but you?" I couldn't stand still anymore. "If it weren't for the accident I wouldn't have you inside my fucking door, Rachel, and you know it. You trapped me."
I knew what was coming, even before her hand connected with my face. It was a usual occurrence. "Do you think you deserve to be happy?" she demanded. "You know what that accident cost me. You're a fucking waste of fresh air, Justin Bieber. You should have died that night."
I couldn't agree more with her.
It would have been easier to have died in that car crash than deal with the consequences and live this fucking empty life.

*****

Maxine

I hid in the living room until I heard the front door slam. I took that as a sign Rachel had left and released a breath I felt like I had been holding for an eternity. I'd been in here cleaning when Rachel barged in, screaming and shouting at Justin. They had a massive fight-over me. She knew about last night. Someone told her and she was furious. I cringed thinking of the horrible things she said to Justin.
My urge to run out to the hall and protect him had disintegrated when I heard the sharp, crack of flesh hitting flesh.
I knew that sound well.
I had felt it often enough.
I sat on the couch focusing on breathing slow and even, while trying to ignore the instinct of self-preservation raging inside of my body. It was urging me to run. The door opened and Justin walked in. His eyes widened when he saw me. His reddened cheek was proof as to who received the slap I had heard being bestowed.
A moment of relief surged through me, followed swiftly by an even greater feeling of anguish. I was on my feet and in front of Justin within seconds. "Are you okay?" I reached up and stroked his cheek. "Did she hurt you? Are you sore?" I could feel the tears trickling down my face, but I couldn't stop crying. "You're not any of those names she called you. Don't listen to her." The dark side of me was relieved, relieved that it hadn't been Justin. That he didn't hit...women. Thinking this wasn't the reason I was crying. It was the reason I couldn't stop. I was a terrible person.
"Shit, Max, I didn't know you were in here," he groaned. Justin clasped my face in his hands and looked down at me. His face was etched with concern. He stroked my cheeks with his thumbs, wiping my tears. "Relax. Everything's okay." Justin pulled me against his chest and wrapped his arms around me. He held my head against his heart with one hand and stroked my back with the other. I felt my body relax against the warmth of his and the rapid beat of his heart. "I'm fine," he murmured. "Please stop crying, princess. I don't want you upset."
I nodded and slowly pulled away from him and moved towards the couch.
I sank down and covered my face with my hands.
"What was that?" he asked eventually when the silence grew thick.
I leaned forward and rested my elbows on my knees. "I don't like violence." It was all I could say. I could hardly tell him about the turbulent emotions whizzing through me, all of which concentrated on him.
"Are you sure that's all it was?"
"Because I'm gonna be honest with you, Max, that was scary."
Oh great, I freaked him out. I faked a smile. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I just...I really do not like violence. I am sorry. I don't like knowing she hits you because of me."
Justin let out a soft sigh. "Don't say sorry. That wasn't your fault. She doesn't need much of an excuse to fly off the handle," he said. "I'm just glad you've not been around to witness Rachel's other outbursts. You would have flooded the house with those tears."
I knew he was trying to crack a joke. It wasn't funny. "You mean, she does that a lot to you?" I whispered. I could hear the disgust dripping from my question.
Justin shrugged. "She has a bad temper. She lashes out. I don't like it, but I understand it."
I stood up. I could feel my body shaking. "Why do you let her do that to you?"
Justin laughed. I could tell it was forced. "Have you looked at me lately, princess? I can take a few bitch slaps here and there." How could he make jokes about this?
"It's not a joke, Justin. She shouldn't be hitting you. She treats you so badly...I can't stand it. Rachel needs to see someone. What if she does this to someone other than you? What about when she has children..."
Justin stopped me before I could finish. "Back up, Max, just back the fuck up," he warned. I backed up, all the way to the opposite side of the room. I could feel the anger vibrating from him. "Whatever psychobabble analysis you've constructed in your head about Rachel, you can forget it. You don't know anything about her. And you definitely don't know shit about me. So keep your self-help guides and your goddamn opinions to yourself. I'm not interested in hearing anything you have to say right now."
With that, he stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.
I crumpled to the floor and let the pain flood me.