Remember Me

Prologue: Before

"I came up with another pick-up line today," Caleb, my boyfriend of nearly two years states as he plops down on the couch next to me, smiling smugly.

 "Here we go." I groan, and roll my eyes playfully.

 Caleb and his pick-up lines. He went through a phase a few years ago, when we were just friends. Every day, he would come to school with a new pick-up line. We were super close, since I was the only girl who didn't want to get into his pants. He was quite the looker, let me tell you. Every other girl would either constantly try to flirt with him, or they were too shy to talk to him.

Anyway, he would have me rate the pick-up line from 1-10 on their effectiveness. 10 was 'swoon-worthy', and 1 was 'get away from me you attractive creep'. His words not mine.

"Are you the value of X? Because you're the solution to all of my problems." He smiles cheekily. I have to bite my lip to fight off a smile. 

"Rating?" He asks. "Hmm... about a 7." I respond. No higher than that, because it was cheesy as hell, but no lower because I'm a total nerd, and I love my math puns.

He starts laughing, and pretends to wipe tears from his eyes. "I crack myself up!" He chuckles. 

"You're such an idiot." I roll my eyes, yet again, and I push his shoulders lightly, so he falls back onto the couch. He catches my wrist on the way down, and pulls me with him. I end up laying on his chest with him beneath me.

"I quite like this position..." He says suggestively.

 "You're disgusting." I insult him, jokingly of course.

 "And you're violent." He responds cleverly.

 "But you know you love me." I say smiling widely, and winking, jokingly again. 

"That I do. I love you, Tessie." He pulls me down for a kiss.

Those three words still make me nervous, ever since the first time he said them. I never said them back, and he said that was ok and that he would give me time. I definitely had feelings for him, without a doubt, but love? That's a big word. That word is a promise. One that I'm not ready to make.

I'd been hurt before. I quickly learned to be careful throwing the 'L' word around. Love broke me every way it could. It nearly killed me. I threw myself into love with my first serious boyfriend. When he left me, I sunk so deep into an ocean of depression that I nearly drowned. When my parents died my world was shattered. By then I'd come to the conclusion that love just wasn't for me.

Hurt me once, shame on you. Hurt me twice, shame on me.

Caleb's lips are soft, and smooth, and his arms wrap around my waist. I pull back and take this time to study him, my Caleb. Short, windblown dirty-blonde hair. Bright blue eyes, alive with happiness. He wears a white t-shirt, and grey joggers. Everything about him just screams good, you know?

He's the kind of boy that every father wants his daughter to have, including my dad. My mom loved Caleb, too. They both passed away about a year and a half ago, in a car accident. Now that I'm 18 I have my own apartment, as does Caleb. Before my birthday I went into a foster home. I had literally no relatives, that I knew of at least.

I was lucky to find Caleb. He's kind, funny, smart, and not to mention, quite handsome. I lean in for another kiss. I'm very, very happy being with Caleb. It feels safe, like I could never be hurt when I'm with him.

Just as I go to deepen the kiss, he pulls back and leans his forehead against mine. "Marry me." He whispers, breathless. 

I freeze and when he says nothing for a bit, I assume I misheard. I lean in for another kiss. 

"Tessie," He groans. I pull away, pouting. 

"Yes?" I answer. 

"Marry me." He demands, sounding pretty confident. That was always Caleb's big flaw. He was confident. Too confident.

"What?" I ask, still unsure if I heard him correctly. I feel like a bucket of freezing water has been dumped on me. 

"Marry me Tessie." His blue eyes bore into mine. He looks down and continues.

"We've been dating for over two years now, and I know that I love you with all of my heart. When I see you I can't breathe, and your smile can light up the whole room. I am so madly in love with you Tessie it hurts, so would you please make me the happiest man alive and marry me?" His eyes search mine for an answer.

 "Caleb..." I start, sitting up. "We're only 18." I whisper. He stands up, exasperated.

"So? It doesn't matter how old we are if we know we feel this strongly about each other! Who cares? We can run away together, we can be happy!" He exclaims. 

Yes, I do care for Caleb. I care for him very much, but I have a life to live. I want to be able to go to college, to travel, to make mistakes, and figure myself out. I can't commit to this large of a responsibility this young.

"I... I'm sorry, I can't." I say standing up so that I'm eye level with him. He recoils like he's been slapped.

 "What do you mean Tessie?" He asks his voice shaking. "I can't do this." I whisper. I grab my coat and keys, and walk to the door.

As I'm about to open it, I turn and run back to Caleb. I grab his neck, and pull him into a quick passionate kiss. I pull back and look right into his beautiful eyes.

 "You mean so much to me Caleb, but I can't do this." My voice breaks in the middle of my confession, and I turn and run to the door.

As I leave his flat, Caleb starts shouting.

 "No, Tessie stop! Tessie come back!" His voice cracks, and it takes everything in me not to go back to him. 

The tears never come as I walk out of his building. I climb into the front seat of my Jeep, and pull out of the parking lot. That's when the tears come. They leak from my eyes, burning paths of sorrow into my cheeks. They drip off of my chin as they cascade down my face.

With one hand on the wheel, my other hand pulls at the loose threads at the hem of my jean shorts. It's a nervous habit I acquired a few years back. A stray tear drips onto my bare leg and I look down. I trace patterns in the water on my thigh, finally able to control my ragged breathing.

Deep breath in, exhale out.

Well you know what they say. There is always calm before the storm. In that case, the white pickup truck barreling towards me at 90 miles an hour must have been a hurricane.