Tonight's my birthday. Yay
Haha, no. You obviously can say that I'm pretty weird but I wasn't waiting my birthday, I didn't expect this day to be very different from the others. So I kinda have a little depression. I've lost all my friends or people that I could name them like that. Now I can see all my real friends. They are my parents that I don't want to appreciate so much. I'm so weird that I can adore my mom and dad and then 5 minutes later I can watch them falling down the skyscraper. Haha, seriously. My Wattpad became to me a little blog, a diary where I can share my feelings with myself. To be honest I can't get all my mind completely but I started to notice my changing.
First of all my unexpected maturity. I can see and understand the things that wouldn't be so interesting to my generation, I see the world differently.
The second thing is my pride. I'm so proud of myself that now I can influence on my subconscious. How? As always I was laying in my bed at 4 in the morning and I was screaming at myself for being fat and ugly and then I told myself very seriously: "Hey, you! Can you fucking hear me?" At this time my third eye (the space between eyebrows) started to warm and I thought that it was listening: "Do you remember the time you used to weigh 46 kilos? So why the fuck are you still eating? Do you want to feel all this jealous sights, put on your new skinny jeans that are extremely small for you right now, do you want a boyfriend?"
This talk made me starve for two days that I'm very proud of. I can feel my power and will. I know that I'm telling different things compare to previous part but... Oh my goodness. That dreams about my skinny legs and gaps between thighs don't leave me alone. I used to say these words before but the next day I had breakfast, lunch, fats, sweets. In brief, I broke away and let my dream down. But now I can feel the power that can change me. I believe in it.
So the main problem is eating (or to be exact, not eating) in front of parents, because once we had the problem with diets.
Have a nice time and happy birthday to me:(
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Lifetime.
PoetryTo be honest, I bet my life that lots of girls want to look like Cara Delevingne, they wanna have skinny legs and this fucking gap between them. Have you ever had a dream of a perfect body? The body that wouldn't have any flaws and fats. Have you ev...
