Angels Vs. Devils: The Little People

1

A voice booming with power originating from the heavens spoke. "In every place, there is forsaken knowledge. Facts so mind-boggling that any organisms that even hinted at a glimmer of it would..."
" Oh shut up already, Mr. All-Powerful-Ruler. I want to start." Said the sitting figure on a ebony chair cloaked in mist as black as midnight, with a skull of a human one moment, and a red humanoid figure with horns the next solicitously.
" Why do you interrupt me like this, Death? You know how much I like to monologue," Sighed God lazily with his flowing white toga in his cloud-chair."..,and anyway, we only get to do this every millenium or two. Do you know how much happens in a millenium? You probably don't even know what happened in the last 5 seconds, or whatever those," God paused for a second."Hue-mains-"
" It's hu-man-z, God. Jeez, keep track of your creatures." Death abashedly wheezed." And I like being called Satan. I call you what you want to be called, so you better do the same for me or I'll-"
"Okay, calm down. And you are right, they are hu-man-z, whatever they call themselves. Now do you feel better? Good. Now, as I was saying, most of the stuff I made long ago aren't even deferential to me these days. It hurts, Death." God bowed his head as he said these words, in some form of regret for the good old biblical days when all his creatures were worried about was how to best serve Him and follow His rules."So, do you want to play?"
"Yeah, I want to play. But I just find it weird how we sound like your stupid mortal play-toys when we talk into each other. I prefer my disdainful voice. It is a whole lot more scary then 'Hey, you? Yeah, you! Come over here and serve me, you foolish brat of an ape!' You know what I am saying?" Satan barbarously whined." Now we even whine too. This is ridiculous." Satan exclaimed.
"Yeah, I know. Let's start before human civilization is wiped out again. I absolutely despise having to rewind time so that we can actually play before anyone starts questioning why people aren't doing anything good or bad on Earth (An amazing amenity, but He wasn't quite sure how He got it. Did someone give him this power, or was He just born with it? He didn't particularly care, his followers could squabble over that for him). You know what it does to my followers." God vigorously said as he conjured an immense playing field as big as a world(which, in a sense, it was) with everything from crags to mesas to oceans in it, populated by the armies of God and Satan, parishioners and demons, armed to the teeth(the demons actually were literally armed to the teeth), awaiting their orders from their masters above.
" Oh, yeah. This is gonna be bad." Cackled the Devil. "Really, really bad."
" So the rules we agreed upon, oh, 600 years ago are as follows. We each have one move, and one move only. We can make them as complex as we want, but we have to do them at the same time, and we each have as much prep time as we need. The sides are balanced, and modelled to show our characteristics. But, we can't directly interfere with the game. Then we shall have some fun. Deal?"
" Yeah, we have a deal. Some might call it a deal...with the Devil." Satan laughed maniacally at his own terrible joke, and God simply shaked his head in disgust at Satan's joke.