i'm sorry // cake au (completed)

nine

tipsy, tipsy. i slammed another note onto the cold, marble bar counter, as i shouted for another drink.

"ONE MORE, JEREMY." i pressed my elbows onto the counter and shut my eyes as i waited. the music was blasting so loudly that my heart felt like it was pounding in cadence. before long, jeremy placed my whiskey in front of me. without thanking him, i brought it up to my lips and rolled my eyes at the amazing sensation of the liquid running down my eager throat.

halfway finished with my seventh drink, i sat on the stool, freezing at the sight of someone familiar standing at the bar entrance. not knowing what i was doing, i laughed like an idiot and burped thunderingly. that familiar face soon disappeared and i went back to drinking my whiskey.

a blonde boy took a seat beside me and that was when i went insane. i hopped down the stool and put my arms around him, causing him to jump at the sudden contact. he looked at me from the corner of his eye and i saw him smile. he told jeremy to get him a blue hawaiian and he let me move onto his lap. without hesitation, i hopped up and tousled his painfully familiar blonde hair.

"you bastard, i missed you." i said, clearly unaware of who he was.

"i just met you," his voice was deep. just like luke. his voice wasn't as alluring as luke's, but i still thought it was him.

"you stopped going to meet me at the library. why why why whyyyyy." i slurred and he thanked jeremy for his drink. he took a sip and then smiled at me, his eyes twinkling.

"let me guess. you just broke up?" he said.

"stop fucking playing, luke. why did you leave me? was it the kiss?"

he chuckled. "i'm not luke! my name's joe, okay? i came to meet some of my online friends, but they ditched me just five minutes ago. now what,s your name?"

i furrowed my eyebrows and rested my head on his shoulder. he protectively put his arms around my lower torso, while mine were on his other shoulder. "i'm calum. are you sure you're not luke? because you look a lot like him."

he nodded. "i swear to god, i'm joe." he brought his hand up to my cheek and pinched it, causing me to giggle. slowly, i moved my right hand to his ear and caressed it gently, as we gazed into each other's eyes. at that moment, i realized his eyes were the same shade of blue luke's were, and that made my heart stop.

"you're fucking lying, you're luke. YOU'RE LUKE." i said in agony and without thinking twice, i kissed him. i smashed my lips onto his. his lips tasted like the blue hawaiian he was consuming, they were also very kissable.

my breathing hitched as he deepened the kiss. he cupped both sides of my face and i locked my hands behind his neck. as his tongue slid into my mouth, we both stood up from the stool and soon i was pinned onto the wall. my erection was grinding against his, everything was so heaty. i snaked my arms all around his body and underneath his shirt. i teased his nipples, earning a few moans from him.

he palmed me through my jeans and i pulled away, tilted my head backwards and groaned in pleasure. he sucked on the skin of my neck and left me a few hickeys, which i haven't received in a long, long time.

when he was going to kiss me again, i stopped him by grabbing hold of his jaw and drilled my eyes into his soul. he had sweat dripping down his forehead and he was panting. i softened my stare and he smiled, he looked like he was ready to move things to the next level.

"i love you so much," i whispered, leaning my forehead onto his. he nodded. "remember not to leave me again, or i'll suffer from eternal depression. promise me, luke."

he smiled nervously before answering me. "i'm joe... i'm not luke, calum. i'm j-o-e, joe."

i wasn't convinced. he looked exactly like luke, plus i was drunk as hell. i shook my head and then brought the shaking to his shoulders. "no," i told him. "you're lying. you just don't want me to find out you're you because you hate me. you don't want me to love you."

he stroked my tear stained cheek with his thumb and kissed it. "no, i'm not luke."

i pushed him off me with my hands on his chest. i was furious. i breathed in and out heavily. i grabbed the nearest object on the counter, which was a wine glass, and threw it at him. he was on the floor, shattered pieces of the wine glass surrounded him and his forehead was bleeding.

"YOU'RE A LIAR. YOU'RE LUKE, YOU FUCKING LIAR! GOD, JUST ADMIT IT! NOT ADMITTING YOU'RE LUKE WON'T MAKE ME LOVE YOU ANY LESSER. I'M ALREADY OCEAN DEEP IN LOVE WITH YOU, FOR YOUR FUCKING INFORMATION!"

people held me back from pressing my own body against his. i wanted to kiss him, but i also wanted to kick the living shit out of him for lying to me.

what happened after that, i can't recall at all. but i know that poor joe, is fucking terrified of me now.