Unprecedented Silence

Nathan

I opened my eyes and I was blinded by a light so bright I thought I was already in heaven or somewhere otherworldly. I must've been asleep for a long time because it took me a while to adjust from the searing brightness emanating from the artificial light that hung above me. Shortly after I manage to open my eyes, I felt excruciating pain all over my body. It was as if every muscle was swollen and sore. Imagine the feeling after being beaten by a gang in a dark alley; that is how I felt. But it was nothing compared to the pain I felt inside my head. I cannot move myself freely because of the machines attached to me. I wanted to get up but it proved to be a collosal task because I can hardly move my fingers.

I tried to remember what happened and why I'm feeling this way but I can't remember anything. The more I tried to search my memory, the more my head ached. I stopped forcing myself and instead looked around me. Only then I realized that I was in the hospital. The walls were painted white and minimal fixtures which include a small table and two stools were placed at the far end of the room.
I was taken aback when I turned my head and saw someone staring at me. A woman who I easily recognized as a nurse because of her white scrubsuit was holding a clipboard and a pen. I tried reading although I cannot understand the expression on her face. What I noticed was that she was pretty; brunette with brown, child-like eyes, full lips and petite frame. She smiled at me, a very warm, contagious grin that I almost felt like smiling myself. But suddenly, the drilling on my head became so unbearable. I screamed and reached for my head praying that it'll ease the racking that was happening in my brain.

I figured the nurse might have been alarmed because she reached for the intercom and called for assistance. Soon, doctors and other nurses came rushing inside the room. They restrained my arms and they injected something in my I.V. Instantly, I felt dizzy, sleepy and the throbbing headache started to dissipate. I floated into one of the longest sleep I've had in my life.

In my dream I saw a woman. I easily recognized her because she's my mother. She looked at me with those sad gray eyes, the eyes which I have memorized by heart. The look on her eyes was the same as when she made me promise to her that I will become a better man and husband to my future wife. It was our last conversation before she died and that's when I told myself that I'll be anything but the man who broke my mother's heart. I promised that I will never abandon the people I love and I will keep all the promises my father could never keep. She just stood there her arms outstretched as if trying to tell me to reach her. I extended my arms but she was drifting away. I ran after her but she was gone before I could touch her.

My mother disappeared and another woman materialized in front of me. I believe that I should know her name but I cannot recall it. She was looking at me, her eyes were streaming with tears. I cannot explain but her expression was that of grief and disbelief. It was as if she was blaming me for her misery. I wanted to comfort her but for every one step I make forward, she moved one step backward. She finally uttered words that shattered everything I believed to be true.

"You promised me you'll come back but you didn't. You were no different than your father."

I wanted screamed but no voice came out of me. All my life I did my best to shy away from my father's memory. A lot of people said I looked like him. But I always tell myself that I will never become like him. The woman's words echoed in my mind like a broken record.

I was awaken by the same nurse I saw the first time I opened my eyes.

"Sir, you were groaning in your sleep and so I thought I should wake you. Are you okay?"

The physical pain I felt all over my body when I first came into consciousness was still there, but it was incomparable to the pain the dream brought to my psyche. The dream was so real that it scared me even just to open my mouth to answer the simple question the nurse asked me. I looked away from her and tried to stop the repetitive voice of the nameless woman inside my head.