Stare At the Photograph - A.F.I.

13

ALYA

We're back in Ashton's car, but definitely aren't going anywhere. Ashton is sitting in the backseat and I'm sitting in his lap as we're making out. I finish unbuttoning his shirt when his phone buzzes again for the millionth time.

"Is that your fans?" I tease with a giggle.

"Sorry, must've gone past my DND." He groans, as his hands play with my hair. "Let me shut it off."

He grabs his phone, but pauses to look at his phone.

"What's wrong?" I ask, trying to glance at his phone.

"Oh God," He whispers.

"Ashton?" I say with concern in my voice.

He takes a deep breath and looks me in the eye.
"This is gonna kill the mood once I tell you."

I lean back in to kiss him one more time and then pull away.

"Okay tell me."

"Michael just texted that we're trending on Twitter." Ashton says, turning his phone to me.

"Oh god!" I groan burying my head into his chest. "I never had these issues when I dated him."

"The last album was our most popular one. I mean 'Youngblood'?" Ashton says, rubbing my back.

I don't even want to know what they're saying about me. Sleeping with your ex's best friend. We weren't be careful at all. It's not that I care what Michael thinks, but more of why is my personal life and decisions on blast.

"I'm ready to go home now. This really did kill the mood." I say, readjusting my top.

"Babe..." He says, playing with my hair.

"This was a bad idea." I say, swinging myself over to the seat next to him.

"Ash, stop calling me babe." I say burying my face into my hands. "You don't even know me and I don't know you."

Our attraction to each other is purely physical. It probably feels so good because we know we shouldn't be doing this.

"What do you mean? We've hung out." Ashton says in that gorgeous accent of his.

I look up at him and ask, "What's my job?"

He looks at me with a blank face.

"What's my favorite color?"

He continues to stare.

"What's my middle name?"

"Okay, you've got me there." He says, placing his hand on my thigh.

"I've been working at as marketing coordinator at a large scale printing company. My favorite color is red and I don't have a middle name." I tell him. "God what am I thinking?"

I tried to get up off his lap, but he pushes my thighs down firmly.

"You're thinking that I'm a musician, my favorite color is also red, and my middle name is Fletcher." Ash says. "We just met. It's okay if we don't know each other's mother's names right away."

After the way my relationship with Michael ended, my anxiety has gotten so much worse. I never had a problem with trust, it was more of the feeling like I'm always failing. First, I had to take an extra semester of school because I had to switch my major because Actuarial Science wasn't working well for me. I did it to please my parents anyways. They weren't happy.

The breakup with Michael felt like another failure to me. I mean, how could I ever trust someone in that way ever again?

"Let me take you somewhere." Ashton says.

"But—" I begin to say.

"No one will be there." He says reassuringly. "I promise."

—

The drive was consistent of Ashton and I actually learning about each other. He actually finished high school as opposed to his bandmates, his parents aren't together, and his stepdad taught him how to play the drums as a kid.

Ashton wasn't the fuckboy I thought he was, which is stupid because on reflection, he spent a day with me in New York without his best friends to cheer me up, even though he also probably wanted to lock himself alone in a room like I did.

Ashton parked the car and we got out to walk on the sketchiest gravel path.

"Alya, just trust me." He says, grabbing my hand and squeezing it for reinsurance.

We walk down the path in silence and it leads to a gorgeous view of LA.

I've lived here for four years and I've never been here before.

"See and no one's here." Ashton says, wrapping his arms around my waist.

I look up and smile at him. Then we melt into a kiss.

—

"Ashton, I'm literally covered in dirt!" I say, laughing.

I'm once again sitting in his lap, but time on the dirt.

"I think this is your best look yet!" Ashton says, reaching for something in his pocket. "Even better than that sexy number you wore for my show."

There it was. Ashton pulled out my little silver digital camera that I've been missing for months.

"My camera!" I say, shocked. "I guess I've seduced you enough for it back."

"Not quite." He says, taking a picture of me.

"Let me—" I try reaching for the camera, but he quickly moves it away. "Ashton?"

"No don't take it!" He snaps, with desperation in his eyes.

I roll off his lap onto the floor.

"I only agreed to this to get the camera back. It has a lot of memories." I say angrily.

"So you didn't want to see me?" He says, looking into my eyes.

I look towards the city lights.

"Well I thought I made that clear over text." I snap.

"I thought you were just messing around." He says.

I could feel his eyes burning into my head.

"I-" I began. I didn't even know what to say. I turned to him and saw genuine sadness in his eyes.

"Just take it." Ashton says and drops the camera in my lap.

——————
Author's Note: OOOF! That's so awkward. That car ride home is gonna be so awkward.