It's Been A Long Day

Part 14 - Dawson's PoV

No big words this time 😊
Just please, leave me some reviews, I looooove reading what you guys think and it motivates me so much 🙈
I hope you enjoy this chapter ❤️
____________________________
Antonio met me at the airport.
Brett drove me home so I could grab some stuff, but I only took a jacket. I was too nervous to think of anything else I might need.
Then Sylvie took me to O'Hare.
Antonio was waiting in the parking lot. When he saw me getting out of the car, he immediately walked towards us and pulled me into a long embrace without saying a single word. When he let me out of his hug, he let his eyes wander over me, placed his hands on my shoulders and spoke clearly and distinctly: "He is gonna be okay, Gabby."
I nodded my head, making some time to find the confidence to speak. "I know", I responded, and I had never doubted anything I said more than I did in this very moment.
"We gotta go", Antonio said with a look at his watch, "the next flight to New York is boarding in 20 minutes." He slightly clapped Brett's shoulder and after she gave me a quick comforting hug, I followed my brother into the airport.
We rushed through the big halls. When we arrived at the security check, Antonio showed them his badge and without any questions they led us in front of the line.
I was like in trance when we made it to our plane and endured the safety instructions.
As the plane started to move, I felt this sickness again.
No no no, I thought by myself, not now.
I slightly leaned forward and put my hand on my forehead. When we took off, I tried to breathe as slowly and steady as possible, but it seemed to only make it worse.
Then suddenly, I felt Antonio's hand gently rubbing my back in circles, and within minutes I started to feel better. I leaned back again and gratefully placed my head on my brother's shoulder.
I decided it was time now. I should finally say it.
"Antonio", I started, without looking up to him, "there's something you should know. I am-"
"I know", he said, not letting me finish my sentence.
"Of course you do", I smiled, "how long have you known?"
"I suspected it the night you followed Casey to New York. I didn't want to ask. I know you well enough Gabby. I knew you would tell me when you're ready."
We sat in silence for a few minutes, until I decided to reveal my thoughts to him. "This scares me, Antonio", I said.
He turned his head to face me. "What do you mean?"
"What if I'm a horrible mother? What if this child is going to hate me?"
My brother wrapped one of his arms around my shoulder, and when he spoke, his voice was soft. "Do you want me to be honest?", Antonio asked, "There are gonna be times that you will feel like you have failed. But in the eyes of your baby, you will always be the best mom in the world."
He placed a kiss on the top of my head and I smiled. "Thanks, Antonio."
We remained silent for the rest of the flight and when we landed in New York City, there was a driver waiting to take us to the hospital Casey had been brought too.
It was around noon, so the drive took forever, and with every second that passed I got more nervous.
When we finally got to our destination, we rushed inside.
"Matthew Casey?", I asked the nurse at the front desk.
"What's your relationship to the patient?"
"I'm his-", I hesitated. "He's a friend."
"I'm sorry Ma'am", the woman said, "I can't provide any information, since you're not family."
"Listen, lady", I hissed and threateningly pointed my finger at her face, "if you don't want me to shove your damn rules up your ass, you'd better tell me what I'd like to hear!"
"Listen, lady", she mocked me, raising her eyebrow and crossing her arms. "I give you 30 seconds to turn on your heal and leave this hospital before I call the security."
Before I could say anything in response, I heard a voice behind me. "It's okay, Marge. I'll take care of this."
I turned my head and saw Detective Benson coming towards us. She walked past the front desk, waved her hand at us, and Antonio and I followed her without even looking at Marge again.
We followed Olivia around the corner into a hallway, where she stopped and - surprisingly- hugged me.
"It's good to see you", she said while shaking Antonio's hand.
I wanted to ask, but at the same time it was the last thing I wanted to do. Finally, with a lump of fear in my throat I asked: "How is he?"
Detective Benson faced me, sighed, then placed her hand on my shoulder and I prepared myself for the worst.
"He's out of surgery."
A cry of relief left my mouth. I fell against Olivia and she hugged me again.
"The bullet hit his left collarbone. He was lucky it failed his heart. He hasn't woken up yet and they don't know how long it will take, but he's going to be fine. They expect a full recovery."
I felt tears streaming down my cheeks and I didn't even bother wiping them away. "Can I see him?"
"They don't want anyone in his room", Benson answered, but seeing the expression on my face she added: "But I'm sure I can sneak you in."
She led me to room 496, where Detective Amaro and Detective Rollins were guarding the door.
Olivia whispered something to them, they exchanged a look, then stepped aside to let me pass.
I gratefully smiled at Nick and Amanda when I entered the room.
As I stepped in, I felt my heart skip a beat. Casey was laying there, in the middle of the room, surrounded by machines and tubes. His skin looked pale and he seemed smaller than ever before.
But he was breathing. He was alive and breathing. That was the only thing that mattered to me in that moment.
I grabbed a chair and sat down next to the bed. For a while I remained silent, but then I realized that I didn't have so much time.
"I'm glad you're not dead", I said, my voice shaking. Even though I knew he couldn't hear me, I continued: "I am, really. I couldn't have taken another death." Pictures of Shay's lifeless body flashed through my mind. "Please wake up soon, okay? I need you to wake up. I - I need you. Because... you're going to be a dad. I'm pregnant. So please, please wake up." I stood up from the chair and ran my fingers through his hair. I rested my hand on his cheek, and just focused on the warmth under my palm. Then, after a few minutes, I slowly bent down and carefully placed my lips on his.
I thought of all the times I had kissed him before. I imagined that now wasn't so different. Just this time, he wasn't awake to kiss me back.
When I spoke the last three words, my voice was barely more than a breath: "I love you."