Suicidal Save

Chapter 15 One cut..

This chapter is going to be in Frue's pov..

Frue pov (before 1am @8)
I woke up from my alarm I set to 8:00 and streched out on my bed. Looking at my dresser, I decided to take a shower and change into some new clothes. I got up and walked over to on of the drawers that I labeled 'dresses' and pulled the knob. I looked at all my variety choices and smiled. Ive always saved up to buy more and more dresses because I love them.

Picking up my black dress with a cut slashed on each side as the design, I went into the bathroom and turned on the hot water. I waited for the water to heat up and started to just sit down. I felt the water and realized it was hot enough for me to go in. I stripped down and felt the steam calm me.

-*-*-

I got in the mirror and picked up my makeup bag, and picked up colors that matched my dress. I used the liquid eyeliner to start on my wing and it looked very neat. But can I do it on the other eye is the question. I started on the other eye and surprisingly it was looking good, and even. I put my hair into a quick bun at the bottom, since everyone does it at the top, and walked out into the palace. I walked down the halls looking for Kahatra's room, but saw a shadow.

Curiosity got the best of me, and I followed it, and it lead me into the den where everything was comfortable, I laid my eyes on a guy that was eating popcorn while watching a movie. I could sense he was a wolf, as was I but he didn't notice me yet. I looked and saw what movie he was watching, and saw it was.. Nemo?!?!

I started laughing and his head snapped up to me. He looked caught like a deer in headlights watching nemo of all movies.

I saw his eyes flicker from black to hazel, and suddenly my laughing died down when I noticed his serious face was showing no emotion whatsoever.

Mate! Mate! My wolf exclaimed.

Are you serious?

Yes! Now go to him!

But he was watching nemo!

My wolf chuckled and then blocked me out.

Fine, I thought. I walked over to the sofa and sat next him him making him shoot up standing.

"No..." He said frantic

"...Something wrong" I said, trying to comfort him. I don't really know how this mate thing works exactly, since I was never really good with guys, but I know I can be nice.

"I don't want one."

"...Want what" I said reaching out for some of his popcorn, but instead my hand brushed over his, and he threw the popcorn down. By the sudden action, I jumped, a bit frightened.

Did he do that because I touched him? I hope I didn't make him mad.. It was an accident.

"...Sorry" I looked down. I didn't mean to upset him

He sighed, and sat down. I mentally smiled, because he probably sat down next to me to comfort me.

"Don't say sorry" his wolf said in an authorizing tone. I could tell he was an alpha and my wolf purred in the back of my mind just enjoying everything. He's an alpha.. But he watches nemo...

"...Okay" I said

His eyes flickered back to normal and he jerked away when I tried my best to slowly reach for his hand. "I don't want a mate."

I had to keep myself from choking on all my organs getting ready to fall out my mouth from my wolf pacing around suddenly upset.

"...What"

"My wolf won't let me reject you so I have to live with it for now. Until you die of course." Slash," which can be arranged" and another slash in my heart.

I started crying and I nodded my head. He just shrugged and walked off with his eyes flickering black and hazel again. I stood up and ran back to my room. I'll just have to meet up with Kahatra another time. I went in my room and sat on the bed. I let the tears fall out my eyes but I fixed my now straight face, suddenly emotionless.

I slowly turned and saw one of the blades I use to chip off wood to make sticks for stakes. I picked it up and lifted my dress so I could see the side of my waist.

One cut because he doesn't love me

One cut because he doesn't pay any mind to me

One cut because he doesn't care

One cut because maybe it's not him..

One cut because its me

One cut because I'm not good enough

One cut because I did it

One cut because it was my fault he doesnt love me, not his

One last cut because I let him down.

Satisfied with the blood pouring onto my covers, I set the blade in my accesory drawer, because these scars are my permenant accessories I plan to keep having. I walked into the bed, not bothering to change or wipe off my makeup nor clean my cuts, and almost fell asleep. "One cut" I recited before I finally fell into a deep sleep