》Fate《

Chapter Nineteen: Will I Lose My Dignity, Will Someone Care?

 "And the fake tattoo that you drew on my arm had an 'X' and an 'O', never change who you are, throw our hearts in the air."- The Summer Set: Lightning In a Bottle.

Chapter Nineteen: Will I Lose My Dignity, Will Someone Care?

A certain Gryffindor with terrible perception skills (I got a pillow thrown at me when reading him this,) was jealous, and as a result of that, acted far too dramatically (pillows are being pelted at me, send h e l p). James Potter, after seeing Remus and I, had went to the one person he believed would be able to help him. Athena Parker. Athena, being the nice friend that she truly is, took James hand, and led him to Jennifer Tribec, a Hufflepuff sixth year. Also, the schools highest ranking slut. {A/n: pardon my language.} Unfortunately, what they did is another story to tell, and if I elaborated now, well, spoilers.

This leads us to where we are now; in avoidance of each other. One of us would go to breakfast, just as the other left, and it continued through virtually everything. Well, except classes.

Lily rambled on about the mission, and it started to feel like her speeches weren't helping anymore. It wasn't the mission I was concerned about, in fact, I didn't care about the mission anymore. I just wanted James. Some small part of me knew that through everything that had happened, James meant more to me than anyone else, and in his absence I was numb.

Over the years I've had a load of practice pretending to be happy. Pretending that even though two minutes ago I felt a chordae tendineae rip itself in two, I haven't been happier. These shallow emotions leave shallow hearts, and shallow actions. The only way I can describe it is by simply going through the day by doing what you're supposed to, nothing more or less, and not adding any emotion.

Lily noticed, of course. She's been around me since day one at Hogwarts, and I suppose she knows me more than I do. She also knew not to mention it. That the mere topic would have me on edge, and maybe I won't be happy for a while, but it's better than me being angry.

Years later, as I'm writing this, James mentioned to me that even though he didn't express it, he noticed too. My once mischievous eyes were empty, and my pale skin was sickly. He noticed it took a toll on my health, something I didn't notice until it was too late.

I was working on a Transfiguration essay in the common room when everything started to get better. Lily was translating runes beside me, and Sirius, and Remus were planning a prank by the fire. Everything was calm. At least, until James walked in with the world's biggest love bite on his neck.

"Prongs, you've got something on your neck, mate." Sirius joked, and a fire ignited in me. I was furious. I shut my book on GAMP's law, and pushed off of the loveseat, storming over to Prongs.

"James Potter you've got to be one of the most inconsiderate toe rags on the planet!" I screamed at him, pointing my finger in a scolding matter. He merely laughed, and I could smell the alcohol on him. How do fifth years get alcohol, anyways?

"Whatever do you mean, Primrose?" he questioned, and I only got angrier. That's when I felt a push, and both James and I were shoved into the supply closet.

"What in the absolute heck is on your neck?" I questioned, and he giggled.

"You're so innocent, Belle. You're cute when you're mad." He replied, and I slapped him across the back of his head. "What's wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with me? The rumour you've been sleeping with Jenny Tribec has been circulating the school like wildfire, and you're asking what's wrong with me?" I responded, stepping closer to him.

"It was one time, and besides you're the one that's sleeping with Remus!" he replied, stepping closer to me so that we were mere inches away from each other.

"Remus and I are best friends and he's dating Emmaline!" James looked taken aback, and I gave him a look as to say 'Yeah, mess with me.'

"Well why were you cuddling when everyone was at Hogsmeade?"

"Because I was torn up from you saying you just wanted to be friends, you idiot!" It was silent for a few moments, and neither of us had moved. James' breath fanned my face as he spoke again.

"I'm sorry for sleeping with Tribec." I rested my head on his shoulder, and breathed in. This was, surprisingly, the calmest I'd felt in a while.

"Then why'd you do it?" I questioned, listening to his heart beat. His hand reached up, grabbing my chin, and forcing my eyes to meet his.

"Because I'm in love with you, Isabelle Lillian Grace Primrose. Completely, and totally in love with you."

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Pic is of Jen btw
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~Belle x