brick walls l.h

flashbacks and friends

song: crazy//daniela andrade

---

"We did it! We're actually getting out of this hell hole." Holly squealed, bursting into Paige's room.

She looked beautiful, Holly always looked beautiful. Her graduation dress sat perfectly on her figure, draping down to her calf's.  The silky blue fabric hugged her curves and matched the clip that held up her bleach blonde hair in a neat bun.

"You look stunning Paige!" She exclaimed, running over to where Paige stood in front of her bedroom mirror, adjusting her own dress.

"And black - what a great choice! Did the women in the store suggest it for you because it's slimming?" She continued to blabber and perched on the bed. "I can't believe you got your fat ass through high school."

Paige forced a smile, still eyeing her own body in the mirror. She ran her fingers over the dark slimming fabric, sucking in her stomach.

She wasn't fat, not even close. But Holly, on the other hand, was probably the skinniest girl in the school -  and she wouldn't let anyone forget that (not even her best friend).

You're not fat. You're perfect.

Paige repeated the words in her head, drowning out the sound of her best friend whining about expensive shoes and hot college boys. She closed her eyes, letting her thoughts sink in.

The knot in her stomach settled and she grinned, re-opening her eyes.

I'm hot.

"Are you even listening to me?" Holly huffed, leaning back onto her hands.

She's right, black is slimming.
---

Paige woke the next morning with a smile on her face, remembering that she just happened to be living in New York City. Sweet.

The sun snuck through her curtains, glimmers of light dancing on her plain bedroom walls. She pulled her laptop from her bedside table and opened it up, scrolling through comments on her new blog post.

"it's so cute! maybe i will see you when i come to the city next month"

"apartment goals holy shiz"

"I'm so proud! My Paige is growing up <3"

About 95% of her blog comments were always positive, her fans were like family. They would literally support her through anything and Paige adored that. However, not all readers admired her as much as her fans.

"this is all fake, she was a slut in high school"

"GET YOUR UGLY ASS OFF THE INTERNET FAME WHORE"

"you were a bitch to me at school, how can all these people adore you?"

She deleted them quickly, before the press made up some stupid story out of nothing. This would happen constantly; someone from her past would find her blog, and comment whatever they could to create drama. And every single time, she would pretend it didn't get to her (but it did).

Grabbing her phone and yanking the charging cable out, Paige dialled her best friends number and leaned back into the pillows.

"Lucy, it happened again."

"Did you delete them?" The delicate voice spoke through the phone.

"Yeah I did," She sighed, rubbing her temples. "But it's getting worse Lu, I don't know what to do any more."

The line stayed silent for a while, before Lucy spoke. "Don't let it get to you Paige. That was the old you, the one who gave up on herself because she had no way out. You're not her any more. Look at you, you're chasing your dreams. Don't let your past hold you back."

"Thanks Lu."

"No problem babe. I have to go, I'm going shopping with Holly in 10."

Paige sat up at the mention of her friend. "She hasn't spoken to me since I moved here." Paige sighed. She'd left like 10 texts, but Holly never replied.

"Don't worry about it, she's probably still sad about you leaving. I give it another week - tops." Lucy assured. "Look I've gotta go. Just remember, I encouraged you to start that blog up. Don't let me down Spencers!"

They laughed and exchanged goodbyes, Lucy eventually hanging up. Paige shut her laptop and snuggled back into her duvet, Lucy's words on her mind.

Don't let your past hold you back.