My Funeral

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My funeral.
I never thought it would be like this.
Im caught watching,
Waiting for someone, anyone
To come and say something nice.
The only ones to show up though;
My brother who hated me
The mother who left
My father who can't speak
My little sister who cant stop crying
And my best friends who are hugging,
Saying that they're pissed I left them

Its not my fault.
I fucked up.
I wish I could go back and change it.
But here I am,
Dead. Waiting,
For the promised "light at the end of the tunnel"
To see my grandparents,
waiting to embrace me,
Tell me I'll be fine.
Instead I'm here,
Watching my funeral,
Seeing a pine box being lowered into the ground.
Thats me in there.

Slowly everyone leaves
My best freinds left alone.
Standing next to the tombstone, crying
Here lies. ******
A lonely heart
Finally at rest

Finally at rest my ass
Im here, pissed off
My afterlife is here
Watching the people I loved
Screw afterlife
I dont want to be here
Wheres the light?
Wheres my grandparents?
Why am I here?

I stomp all over
My own grave.
My vision blurs
The ground opens up under me.
I see flashes of red,
Feeling like I'm falling forever
And a blackness so dark
It pains me.

I get it now.
This is why I didn't see the light.

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