Will they ever fucking understand? Do they even care? I don't know. And I'm starting not to give a shit. They don't understand, and they never will. They don't deserve any kind of explanation. They're not worth that. As family you are supposed to support and love one another not bring and tear and destroy each other. Mentally and physically I am drained. Mentally and physically I am in pain. And you know what? I don't really deserve the treatment I receive here. What did I ever do to them? What did I do that deemed me necessary of this pain? What issue did I cause that made is acceptable to treat me like shit? And sure, I don't deserve the shit they say and do to me, but there are things I do deserve and they are things only I can do to myself. And you know what? I may need therapy and I may need to be medicated, but it doesn't look like that's going to happen. So you know what? I will recover on my own. Take my own fucking time. Destroy myself over and over just to try and find that perfect person inside me only to realize that I was already perfect. I was just mislead by society, my eyes, and my family. I don't need them and they sure as hell don't need me. So why do I always need their approval? I guess I'll figure that out as soon as i've figured myself out. But as soon as I've figured myself out, I'll know who I am and I won't need anybody but myself to love myself. I'll stop these endless searches to find "The One." I'll stop getting attached to everything and everyone. I'll stop saving the best pieces of myself for the ones who don't give a damn. And I sure as hell will stop making sacrifices for those who don't even deserve a second glance.
Excerpt From A Book I'll Never Write #8
Much Love,
Anna/Asher
YOU ARE READING
You Don't Get It
القصة القصيرة*TRIGGER WARNING* This book may be triggering to others. Read at your own risk. This book will be a series of short excerpts that I have written out of an emotional outburst.
