Ode to Love & Dance

That Wasn't So Bad

I walk up towards Rosa Park Circle, and scanned the crowd for a familiar face and instantly notice a crush from two weeks prior. I thought I would never see her again after not seeing her the week before, but for the week since I met her, she was all I could think about. She was the first person I asked to dance with that night, and it only got more interesting from there.

After the dance, I asked if she went to art prize, and asked her what her favorite art work was. That apparently started the conversation better than I thought as she stayed for several songs. I got a chance to know her. English major, big reader, wants to do missionary work, and write about that missionary work. She goes to Aquinas, and was a freshmen. I asked her if she watches any TV shows and I threw out the show, "How I Met Your Mother," and "Doctor Who," to see how she reacted.

There was a couple moments of silence, but it didn't feel awkward. When conversations was lacking, I asked her for another dance or try to get her moving to another location. She always came along and agreed to dance with me so I figured that things couldn't be going that bad.

I asked her if she plays any video games and her response was, "Yes. Lord of the Rings," I tilted my head as I was curious. She continued, "For the PlayStation 2." The mention of the outdated system made me smile. "I play it with my little brother when I get the chance." I kept to the topic, I told her that I only saw the first movie and I haven't read any of the books but I heard it gets good. That got her going. She raised her volume, "You have to! They're really good! You have to read the Hobbit too!"

I feed on the geek moment and told her that I haven't seen the Star Wars movies either. I imagine that she would say that she hasn't seen them either and state the she doesn't know why it is so popular, but the opposite happened. Her eyes widen. She looked utterly shocked, and I thought it was adorable beyond words. Her body language was screaming, "No. I don't believe you."

I just smiled, and said, "I never had the desire to watch them all." 

All she could say was that I had to see those too.

I was surprised that she stayed for as long as she did. I wondered where her friends were and whether they have noticed that I've been standing next to her this whole time. Soon after, the sound Thriller by Micheal Jackson played. I told her, "I don't know the dance for this," and she told me, "my friends wanted to dance to this," and it was about that moment when her friends ran up, and pulled her away from me and onto the dance floor. I decided not to follow her as I didn't know the dance and I didn't want to be the person trying to learn it. I stood in the same spot wondering if she would come back to me after the song, but she didn't. So, I decided to give her some space and danced with other people for awhile.

Eventually, I saw her and met up with her again and allowed myself into her friend circle. She didn't back away, or told me to leave, and was actually welcoming, so I stayed. No one questioned my presence and eventually one of them introduced themselves to me, so I introduced myself and learned each of their names. 

I thought about how I was going to ask for her number. I thought of a scenario where I asked her if she wanted to dance and pull her away from her friends. And while dancing, I would say, "I don't know when it's a good time to ask this, but can I have your number?" And see what happens from there. 

I tried to pull her in for a Salsa and for a Lindy Hop. I told her that I could teach her, but during each she told me, "I can't do the triple steps! I can only do East Coast Swing, and I'm barely good with that!" I didn't fight it. I joined her and her friends in some solo dancing for awhile and then decided to leave her alone for awhile and danced with other girls.   

Soon enough the host announced that it's going to be the last two songs of the night. I walked up to her again. It was an East Coast. But when I asked she gave a sigh and said, "But I just promised to dance with him," with both of her hands out directed towards him like Vanna White. I didn't take offence because I knew she wasn't lying but I gave her some space. She was about to dance with him but her friends pulled her away into a circle solo dance. She said the same thing to them that she said to me, but eventually gave into the solo dance. 

I walked away and watched her from far. I gave her a chance to dance with him, which she did in the following song. 

I danced with myself for awhile but it wasn't long before I felt a tap on my back and a random girl pulled me onto the dance floor. 

I watched my crush from afar wondering if she was ever going to do a scan of the circle to try to find me, but she never did. Time flew and it was the end of the night. The last song was done, and she was about to leave. So, it was either now, or I would have to spend the upcoming week wondering, what if. 

I walked up to her and said, "So." I got her attention. "Do you think I could get your number?" I didn't know what my chances, but it was worth a try.

Her eyes widen. I could tell she held her breath. She lowered her head and sighed; shaking her head once to the left and once to the right. I could tell she was thinking, "Oh no. I can't believe this is happening." When she looked back up, she smiled at me. She said, "I'm sorry." There was a pause. "I'm seeing someone," she said. "It's kinda serious," she continued. 

"That's okay. We can be friends," I replied.

She lowered her head and did the same thing. When she looked up, smiled at me and said, "I shouldn't..."

I was going to stop there, but I wondered why she hasn't walked away and I figured that she liked what I was doing. That was then when her friend came by and asked, "What's wrong?" I've already met this friend, danced with her too, so I wasn't embarrassed to say, "I'm trying to get her number," while looking directly at her with my left hand pointing towards my crush. I think my crush smiled.

Her friend said, "she's in a serious relationship with someone at the moment," and the first thing that came into mind was, that is not how she said it. I heard the word kinda. I think she's doubting the seriousness of her own relationship. 

It was time to go. Her other friends saw us and said that she could stay and she could catch up with them afterwards. They all left soon after. She looked at me trying to read my thoughts. Her friends has given her permission to stay and she looks like she had no intention of leaving. Yet, I figured there was nothing that I could do at the moment.

I spoke. "You don't have to stay," while signaling with my eyes that she should go catch up with her friends.

She gave me a long smile which felt like it lasted 7 seconds before saying she was sorry again, turned around, and caught up with her friends. A thought popped up in my head--running up to her and offering to walk her to her car--but I figured the moment was as good as it was going to get and a walk could lead to awkward silences along the way. I stared at her for a few seconds in case she turned around, but then walked in the opposite direction, scanned the room for a familiar face, and then walked toward my car.

I hope that this isn't the end of the story. I'm hoping I see her again; that I'll have another dance with her and I get to jokingly ask, "Are you single yet?" And ask her the question that was on my mind that night, "Where is he, and why are you here without him, dancing with other guys?"