Numb

chapter 6

It was quite odd how much me and Emerson clicked. On our date it was like we have been dating for years. We were both just so comfortable around each other.

It was Monday morning, Two days after mine and Emerson Todds first date. I knew that i had to ask her out again, I had to do anything to be close to her. Hear her wonderful laugh, and stare at her beautiful smile.

I also knew that this task wouldn't be easy.

Before school since i had maths first period with her i decided to go to the coffee house down the street and get a Grade iced mocha. I remember Emerson telling me that was her favourite over dinner on Friday. She also told me she loves the cream cheese bagels from here so i decided to grab her one of those to.

I entered the room just like any other school day except this time it was different. My beautiful blonde haired, green eyed girl wasn't sitting in her usual seat by the window in the back corner.

Me being me i started to panic, was she away to avoid me? did i do something to upset her?

After minutes pass of me standing by the door staring at Emersons empty seat i decide to sit down and get ready for class.

I couldn't help but notice Emersons best friend Avia sitting alone next to her empty seat.

When class was finally over i rush over to Avia before she can pick up her books and leave.

"Hey uh, wheres Emerson today?"

"Who knows" she replies without even making eye contact

"Well are you not worried, what if something has happend to her" I stutter trying my best not to sound panicked.

"Look, Emerson does this, its just who she is, she will have a few days off even a week sometimes. She just disappears and no one can reach her, and then she comes back happy as ever, Im used to her doing this wired shit, so no im not worried"

Avia then picks up her books gives me a fake smile and a shrug of her shoulders and leaves the classroom.

It was now Wednesday and still no sight of Emerson. I remember each second that past of me not being able to look at her glistening smile, as she laughs with her friends down the hall killed me.

Yes she wasn't my girlfriend, but she was important to me weather she shared the same feelings for me or not.

That wednesday afternoon i stopped by her house to at least check if she was okay.

I knock on the door, after three loud knocks my body starts to fill with regret and anxiety, until the door swings open and there stood Emerson. Her messy hair tied ontop of her head with a scrunchy, Her short little pyjamas pants showcases her stunning long tanned legs and then her face. No breath taking smile, only the tired expression and sad look that took over her face. This was a new side to Emerson that i have never seen before.

She quickly relised it was me who was standing at the door as she adjusted her tanktop and plasted a big fake smile over her face.

"Oh hey Carter, what are you doing here?" She says quietly while she picks at her manicured fingernails.

"You weren't at school so i came to check if everything was okay with you, Avia told me your fine and you do this a lot but i couldn't help the bad feeling i got when i never saw your pretty smile walking down the halls"

"oh your good" Emerson says with a little chuckle.

"Wh-what, what do you mean im good? good at wh-" I say confused before she cut me off

"Your good with this whole you know act, to try and sweep me off my feet and all that, normally they give up by now but not you, congratulations"

"You think im trying to play some sick game with you or something?"

"Well uh yeah"

"Well uh im not"

"What do you want from me then Carter?" Emerson says with real concern in her voice.

"I want you to give me a chance, I want you to stop building up those walls and just let me or someone in, and most of all i want for you to stop being so afraid of falling in love i can see it in your eyes your just so afraid to let someone in and i need to know why a beautiful girl like you is just so dam guarded all the time" i spit out before i even realise what i was saying.

Emerson looks up from her finger tips and i look straight into her eyes as they start to glisten before she replies.

"Falling in love isn't my fear Carter, My fear is the people i fall in love with, people arnt constant, people change all the time, people leave, people die, and there is nothing i can do if someone leaves, nothing last forever Carter, and thats my fear"

Emerson then gives me a smile and starts to shut the door, just before the door closes i hear a whisper saying.

"Dont give up on me just yet"