The suicide note from her!

I thought i had lost you

I turned around to see my so called mate with my brother pushed up against a wall I heard my mates words run through my head " i thought I had lost you" tears streaming from his eyes I just growled I didn't know what to say but I knew what I had to say he would not take my word even an alpha will never let a mate go " I rejected you and now I'm sure u told me to go and I quote u telling my brother to get his emo sister away from you and so I am" anger rolled through thoughts you could see it in his eyes. My dad ran down the stairs and screamed "get the fuck away from my son and my daughter" I felt my eyes light up then tears fall I knew he couldn't mean it when he said daughter. "Ahh hello rouge I knew it was you." I and brother Kaleb gasped "dad you know this freak of nature" I screamed I knew I may pay dearly for it later if it turned out to be a very close family friend however the look on both their faces told me otherwise.

"Unfortunately em I do" he stared deep in to my eyes with sympathy and sorrow I didn't know why but something told me I was going to find out " he's your mate isn't he em" I stared at the floor I knew if I looked up I would cry he stepped forward and I flinched away "answer me" I stayed silent and once again I felt like a little girl! Scared, defenceless, stupid and depressed as it was when my mother never came back I fell into a dangerous state of depression I could not eat, speak or hear others around me I wouldn't feel pain and over the years it gradually came back slowly however I still rarely speak.

"Answer me now" at that point I was pinned against the wall with my fathers hand my throat in the time I had been against the wall I guessed my dad realised I was getting to a state of depression again and released me and apologised "I'm sorry emery I'm sorry that you both have to hear this from me but he is the monster that murdered your mother tried to murder me, you and Kaleb" I felt my heart stop I sunk to the ground not believing what I had heard I grabbed my heart was I having a heart attack I can't be in only 13 or could it be a panic attack I ran to my room I knew that my brother and so- called Nate was following me I forgot to close the door grabbed my anti- depressants and took the full amount I had just started to come off of them. I knew someone was either talking to me or about me and I was right Reagan was right behind me when I didn't answer him he turned to my bro " why does she take anti-depressants" I sat on the floor in my room rocking by the window where I could see the houses of  parliament.

"She's been taking them since she was 5" I blocked them out after that I just rolled up in a ball rocking back and forth saying under my breath I knew they could hear me still " I wanna die, I wanna die, but how, go anorexic again no that takes to long, maybe shoot myself, drown myself, hang myself" I was listing all the possible ways to end my life but I knew somehow someone or something was not gonna like it and was going to stop me.