The Victorious Time Lord

ATTENTION: I'm Italian and this is a personal translation of my FanFic. This is the first time for me. It has been really hard for me and probably you will find errors so I'm really asking you to tell me what you find wrong so I can check it and correct it. Hope it is not too bad.

Thank you for the attention :)

THE VICTORIOUS TIME LORD

"Is there anything you can't do?"

"Not anymore."

So I answered after saving her.

For a long time I had left myself subdued to the Time Laws, but nothing could stop me anymore. I wasn't the Last Time Lord, I was the Victorious Time Lord.

Once had existed a species with the task of preserve and comply with these laws but they were no more. No one. No one besides me. I represented all my people, I controlled the universe rules. Just me. I was the Time Laws and the Time would obey to me. I was the Time Itself. It had taken years to understand but at that point I had demonstrated it. She had to be dead on that planet but I had saved her. I had defeated the Time.

By then I was sure.

Only for some minutes I doubted again, for a bit I thought I was wrong, this is true. I doubted when that woman decided to brave me, killing herself there, on Earth.

I thought my time had come, I thought I had gone too far and that this would have been the cause of my end.

But the Time would not be able to defeat me. I didn't need anyone. I was enough, me, alone. She had decided to die in any case but I wouldn't have surrendered, by then I had already changed a fixed point in History.

It was a battle by then, a war between me and the Time, and the Time had not to win.

I would have run against the Time and I wouldn't have been reached, I didn't want to go. Maybe my end was near but I wouldn't have allowed it to come. I wouldn't have permitted anyone to knock for four times.

Even when The Master came, with those four beats in his crazy mind, I fought until the last, I risked everything.

The Time would have bended to my will because I governed over it, I was the Time, I was the Victorious Time Lord. Finally I had understood ...

And when, lying on that frozen floor, after I had saved the Earth afresh I realized to be still alive, I thought I finally had done it. I was the one with the world at my feet. Even better: the Time, the History itself, the Beginning and the End, everything was at my feet.

Nevertheless I had understood nothing. Just when I was on the apex of my blind pride, the turning point came about. Till that moment the Time had only teased me. In a second it completely overturned me, with violence it snatched me down from my heroic pedestal that I myself had made with what was nothing but dust.

Sometimes I think that a Time Lord lives too long. For so long to get lost in the infinity of universe.

I had raised myself, creating my own world which subdued itself under my will, basing on my biggest error, on that moment during which I had thought to have reached the same level of God, of Time itself, when the reality instead had continued undeterred on its way, regardless all my breathlessness.

But the most absurd thing, maybe, was the way the Time used to wake me up from my dream of omnipotence: the most artless and humble thing in that room was marking the arrival of what I feared.

An old, a needy old man knocking on a glass to get out from a damned bathing hut was announcing my end.

That same little man who had stayed near me till that moment, who had prayed me to save myself in every way, who had donated me his old gun ...

Obviously he had to get caught in there, obviously he had to knock four times and, obviously, I would have taken radiation in the near cabin to get him leave. It had to be so ...

Perhaps at the end this is what friends do: bring us back to reality, good or bad as it is, almost without realizing, and don't leave us to face it alone. Friends are our travel companions.

In that moment I understood what had happened on Mars, I understood the reason of my fight; the truth was that I had been afraid, afraid because that time I was left alone and alone I couldn't stand that something could not enter in my schemes, in what was good according to my opinion.

I had been afraid because that time there wasn't Donna by my side as at Pompeii, because if you have someone near even the most adverse reality shows its beauty.

Thinking that I had made a lot of travels, I had had a lot of companions, and yet, during all my run, I had never noticed that small pearl.

What had to be the most terrible moment of my life exploited my sorrow and my dissent to open my eyes.

So I decided it was the moment to close the deal. I went to greet from a distance all those companions who had made a piece of road with me, to thank them we can say, in my way, while slowly my time was approaching.

Last I said goodbye to Rose and I picked her smile for accompany me till the end. Then I went back in my blue box. Carefully I caressed every part of what had always been the most loyal companion while the symptoms of the regeneration were starting to be felt.

Sure, maybe I was the Last Time Lord, and yet, never as in that moment, I was the Victorious Time Lord, not for my own merit, not because I had won a war, not because I had defeated my limits.

I was the Victorious Time Lord because, thanks to what I thought was an obstacle to me, thanks to the Time Laws I couldn't oppose, I was finally conscious of what was my strength, the engine which propelled me far and wide.

Although I was the last of my kind I wasn't, and I had never been, really alone. I had a lot of friends spread in all the Universe and, exactly for this, in spite of the fear, I could face up that moment, which terrorized me, too.

By my side I had Martha and Mickey's strength, Donna's courage, Jack's wisdom, Rose's smile ...

I didn't want to go but it was my time and I would have faced it without trying to avoid it.

Note: Here we are! When I read the sentence I choose as inspiration "I was the one with the world at my feet" immediately I thought to the end of the episode Waters of Mars. In fact that sentence, in my imagination, watching the episode, is exactly what the Doctor thinks when he saves the three last people of the crew.

For a long time I thought about what moment could really be the turning point between that moment and the thoughts that, instead, transmitted me the last episode.

At the begin I thought about when the woman kills herself but rewatching the episode it seems to me that, even after that moment, the idea of opposing the Time Laws predominates in Doc's mind. Or that is what I think about the last seconds of that episode.

Instead I noticed how Ten's eyes change when he hears Donna's grandpa knocking on the glass and so I decided to choose that moment as turning point.

The repetition of the word Time is wanted. First of all to underline the word itself and the change about it. Secondly to create rhytm, particularly in some parts/sentences of the fic. Hope I succeded in this and that this is not annoying. Otherwise this is a chance to learn too :)

Write in the first person is risky and is an experiment. I hope what I imagined in Doctor's mind is coherent with his character in those episodes and with what those moments have transmitted. Even for this reason in some points I tried to "quote" some real sentences of the Doctor. I'm always afraid about touching so delicate moments but I try :D

Hope you like it! I waiting for your opinion!! Leave a comment! All your advices are welcome, good or bad opinions, I want to know what you thought and felt reading this because it is all a chance to learn and do better next time.