Lucian for life

Chapter 20

                 

Ashley's pov

I was sure that the only way we could help Lucy was to bring Ian back to her. Although everyone was still feeling hurt and betrayed because she never mentioned anything and kept it a secret from all of us we had to help her. Lucy was an important part of our family and she was slowly dying.

The worst thing about all of this was that we weren't able to help her or to smooth her pain.

What Lisa told us made me worry even more. Lucy had anorexia and now she was refusing food again. What if she's drifting back into anorexia? What if her anxiety of food comes back? What if she doesn't survive?

I had the feeling that something was wrong with Lucy but I never said anything except this one time at the hospital. A part of me blamed myself for this because I didn't talk to Lucy that I suspected something was wrong and a little part of me wanted to scream 'I knew it!' but that would be really inappropriate.

"We need to get Ian into the hospital. I think that Lucy is waiting for him to come," I suggested.

"But we don't know what exactly happened between the two of them..."

"Do you honestly think that Ian left her?" I yelled cutting Shay off.

"No I don't. He wouldn't be so sad if he did," Shay defended herself.

"I think Shay's partly right, Ash. We need to know what happened before we can figure out what to do," Sasha said calmly.

"Is everyone ganging up on me now?" I shouted.

"Calm down, Ashley," Tyler tried to relax me.

"Shut the hell up!" I yelled at Tyler. "I am the one who spends the most time in that hospital. I'm always there because I am scared that something might happen while I'm gone!
And what are you guys doing?
Marlene you forbid Lucian to date! Shay you asked if I wanna go shopping with you!
Troian you aren't even in the room most of the time you're in the hospital café!
Janel and Sasha you don't even care to come!
And Tyler and Keegan I don't know what you guys are doing the whole time!
I am the one who is looking after Lucy and Ian! You guys are doing nothing!"

I could see that my words hurt the others but I couldn't care less.

"We can't go inside because it hurts too much to see Lucy like this!" Janel shouted, defending herself, Troian and Sasha.

"Do you think that this is easy for me? But I stay! I stay the whole fucking time!" I cried.

"I only asked to go shopping cause you could need the distraction from everything!" Shay yelled.

"Don't be such a bitch!" Troian screamed after me as I went out of the house.

I was furious and left Marlene's. I got into my car and drove around without a destination. Why would they say something like this? Could it be that they were right?

I probably only snapped at them like this because I haven't slept in forever. 20 minutes into the drive I realized that I was near Ian's apartment complex.

"Hi, Ashley what are you doing here?" Ian greeted me as he opened the door to his place.

"Nice to see you too," I replied, walking past him into the apartment.

"Did something happen?" Ian wanted to know.

"Not really," I responded, sitting down on his couch.

He sat next to me and questioned "Then why are you crying?"

I hadn't realized the tears rolling down my cheeks.

"Because something did happen."

"Is Lucy OK?"

"Now you care? You weren't there! Not only once did you visit her the past 2 weeks!"

"I couldn't! Luce doesn't wanna see me. She told me to leave and never come back," Ian cried, tears streaming down his face.

"I'm sure she didn't mean it. Lucy is in a bad state. She hasn't moved, talked or eaten since you left. She is going to die without you. And you aren't in a good state as well. All you do is laying in bed or laying on the couch. You're barely talking to anybody. You miss her so much and she misses you too. Please go and see her," I begged.

"I will go tomorrow considering it is 10 already. But I can't promise you anything, okay?"

I nodded and hugged him.

"There's more, isn't it?" Ian questioned, letting go of our hug.

"Yeah, the Doctor Lisa. She told us about Lucy's past. Did you know that she was doing drugs?"

"Yes, I knew. Lucy told me day before her accident. I think that the reason why she got into the accident was because she told me."

"Why would you think that?"

"She told me the night before this whole thing and I asked her if our secret relationship pushed her back into her past and she said yes. If we hadn't dated secretly, Lucy wouldn't have been so weird and self destructive. The next morning I told her that she needed help, she got angry, we started fighting, Lucy ran out and drove away. Then the accident happened," Ian told me, more tears running down his face.

"It's okay, this isn't your fault. It's okay," I tried to reassure him.

I pulled Ian into a hug and he broke down completely. He was crying so hard that it was hard for me not to cry as well.

"Why did you say that she needed help," I questioned when he stopped crying, releasing him from the hug.

"Because I realized that she started eating less and Troian came to me and said that she wasn't her usual self on set either. I was really worried about her. I mean Lucy is the love of my life," Ian explained.

"You still love her, don't you?"

"Of course I do."

I finally knew the reason why he left. Now I was able to help both of them.

Ian's pov

Ashley left my place at 10.30pm and I was completely alone again. Since Lucy and I started dating she stayed here with me.That's also the reason why I didn't leave the hospital while Lucy was in coma.The apartment felt so empty without her.

The past two week someone always came over but at night I was alone. It hurt that I knew that if Lucy wouldn't change her mind, I would probably end up alone for the rest of my life.

Deep inside I knew that I could never feel the same way about another girl. Lucy was special. She was my soulmate. I was so stupid to let her push me away.