Fall Away (Sequel To "Holding On To You: A Twenty One Pilots Fanfiction")

seven

"Shut up," I laughed into my phone. 

"I love you," Dean replied. 

I could feel a smile spread across my face. 

"I love you too... talk to you tomorrow," I said, ending the call.

I sat up on my bed, only to see Tyler peering in at me from the doorway.

Well it wasn't quite a doorway, more like a short hall leading to a small rectangular room with four twin beds. One each for Tyler, Josh, Mark, and I. The hall was connected to the tiny kitchen, which was an open concept with the living area. So essentially, there wasn't much privacy. 

"Lemme guess... Dean?" Tyler asked, cringing as he said Dean's name. 

"Mhm," I answered. 

He stood there looking down. 

"Ready for your first US show?" I asked. 

"Yeah," he sighed sitting down next to me on the small bed. 

"You don't sound too excited," I remarked. 

"I guess I'm a little nervous."

"Tyler," I said placing my hands on his knees, "You'll be fine. It'll be just like any of other shows you've already done." 

He didn't really say anything. He just sat there, looking down. 

"I can't do this Jess. This was a mistake," he said standing up. 

"What are you talking about? The show is sold out... you have millions of fans. You're gonna do great, just like always-"

"No, not the show," he interrupted. 

"What then?" 

"You. Me inviting you. You coming. It was a mistake," he said. 

"Where is this coming from Tyler?" I said surprised. "We agreed before we left, that I was coming as a friend... and that you would honor that." 

"I know what we said." 

"So then what Tyler, you want me to leave? God, just make up your mind. It's push and pull with you Tyler, and we aren't even in a relationship." 

"And I can't stand it!" he yelled. "I can't take you being here... talking to Dean... telling him you love him... being friends with me. It's selfish, I know! I don't deserve you. But if we can't be together... being friends isn't enough. I can't wake up everyday, see you across the room from me, and know you're not in love with me. It'll kill me Jess. It already is."

"Well, then I guess I'd better leave, because God forbid, if Tyler doesn't get his way..." I said, agitated. 

"Jess, I don't want you to leave..." 

"Well you aren't gonna get what you want... good luck tonight," I said, as I started shoving things back into my suitcase. I'd been living out of it so far. I zipped it up, and just like that, I left. 

I called for a taxi, and then for some reason, told him to drop me off at Central Park. I guess part of me really didn't want to leave. I just needed some time to think. 

I rolled my suitcase to a little shaded spot under a tree. I laid it flat, and sat on it, letting out a deep breath. I must've sat there for two hours, pitying myself, and how chaotic my life had become. 

I was angry. Angry that Tyler couldn't accept being friends. I was upset, because I didn't want to lose him for good. I loved him. Half of me said that I loved Dean, and it wasn't lying. The other half said that while Dean was great, he wasn't enough. I told myself I needed passion, and I didn't know if I really had that with Dean. 

Eventually, I got up, walked to the bus terminal, bought a five o'clock ticket and waited. I got a phone call. It was Josh. 

"Jess?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Tyler's freaking out. You need to come back... he needs you, especially before we go on stage tonight." 

"He made it pretty clear he doesn't want me," I replied. 

"Well I'm telling you, he needs you."

"I don't know Josh." 

"Where are you?" he asked. 

"The bus terminal. I bought a five o'clock ticket." 

"Sell it to someone. Come on Jess... for me. For the sake of the show."

I sighed, "Fine."

I sold my ticket for five dollars cheaper to a young woman in line, and got another taxi back to where the bus was. Josh was there waiting. 

"Where's Tyler?" I asked. 

"He's already at the venue... but he's really upset. He's not focused, so come on, hurry, let's go." 

We walked a couple of blocks to the venue. The line to get in was already blocks long; I guess that's how general admission concerts in the city were. Josh and I had to sneak in the back to avoid being bombarded by fans. 

Tyler was pacing his room backstage, shaking his hands. I came up to him from behind, and placed my hand on his shoulder. 

"Tyler?" 

He turned to face me. He wrapped his arms around me in a hug. Josh gave me a thumbs up from behind, and left us to talk alone.

"You came back," he said quietly. 

"I couldn't miss the first show," I smiled, "because it's gonna be killer." 

Tyler laughed a little, "I'm glad you have so much confidence in us." 

"Of course I do... I'm your number one fan, always remember that." 

We were still in hugging position, so I released slowly. 

"I didn't mean what I said. I don't want you to leave... you left, and look at how I reacted," he said. "I guess I just have to learn to move on... or let you move on at least." 

"Shhh... all you have to worry about tonight is the show." 

"I love you Jess," he said. 

And right then, I planted a short kiss on his cheek.

"I love you too," I whispered. 

****

I watched from back stage the entire time. It was truly amazing... the vibe of the crowd, the emotion behind the performance... everything. They were so talented. 

Tyler came off stage all sweaty and out of breath, but I embraced him anyway, telling him how great he was, and how much I loved it.

After all was said and done, I headed back to the tour bus with them and we ate pizza at two in the morning.