Dancing to Thunder - Kim Jongdae

Hell I'm Living

"I dreamed a dream life would be something more than this hell I'm living."

One of the most terrifying days of Yonhee's life was the day she found Jongdae, battered and bloody, behind the restaurant that she served as a waitress at.  He was sitting against the wall -more like slumped against it- as if he were a rag doll that had been tossed to the side.  Initially, Yonhee had assumed he was another drunkard who had gotten stuck and was too tipsy to stand properly.  Then she saw the glisten of something wet around the body.

At the sound of the gasp she released, the persons head slowly raised up and she made a small noise upon seeing the persons face.

"Jongdae!" She breathed and dropped the trash bag she had been carrying, racing over and falling to her knees.  The boy's lip was busted, as was his brow and a thin line of blood seeped down his forehead from his hairline.  A dark bruise was slowly forming along the angle of his jaw and from where Chen's shirt was pulled up a bit around his stomach, Yonhee only identified more bruising.

"What happened?" She brushed his dark hair back from his face, forcing herself not to wince when her fingers slid through the warm blood.

Chen cracked a small, dry smile and Yonhee was more dismayed to see blood inside his mouth as well.  "They needed something to release their anger on. Gwenchana." He shook his head and let it slowly too back so he leaned against the wall. Jongdae shut his beautiful eyes and blew out a breath, his Adam's apple bobbing a bit as he swallowed.

And then it came. First there was one, and then two, and then three. Slow tears creeped from behind his lashes and down his cheeks like butterflies crawling on a fresh bud.

"Mianhe (I'm sorry)," he whispered, voice cracking miserably, "I'm sorry."

"Jongdae," Yonhee's hands trembled as she reached out and folded him close to her, his face buried in her uniform shirt. "What kind of hell are you living?"

Chen just gave her the same broken, distant smile and shook his head.  "We all have a hell."

He pulled away and slowly opened his perfect eyes; damp from his tears and red around the edges.  "I have learned to live with mine." His lips pulled into a pained smile.

A smile that never reached those lonely, lonely eyes.