Identity [ON HIATUS]

9. Daisy, Rose, Daisy...

"Daisy?"

That's not my name.

"Daisy?" I seemed so far away, so far removed. My limbs didn't move the way I wanted them to, my mouth couldn't form the words I wanted to speak, not until I really opened my eyes.

There I lay, in Rose's sheets, my mother staring down at me from the bedroom door. Her brow was furrowed in worry, hugging herself, arms wrapped tight. I didn't really know why, I couldn't figure out why she looked so concerned.

But then I remembered, my life was a broken half.

I sat up, feeling a little disgusted at Rose's unwashed bedding and gave a little stretch. I looked back up at mom, still waiting for an answer.

"I was tired; I thought I might sleep better."

She nodded, as if she would have any idea what I meant. No, shut up, Daisy, she's lost a daughter, she does understand. She gave a deep breath and a smile, and walked away, detached. Life moved differently now, she was allowed to seem unmotherly, to be in her own little word and not really think about me too much. I didn't want her to, it would have been too much to handle.

I wiped my eyes roughly, not like it would do anything. I'd still be here, sleeping in a room for a person who didn't need a room anymore. The back of my hand, when I brought it back down, had turned black; long swipes of makeup. I made my way to our...my...bathroom mirror; I had eyeliner on, poorly drawn eyeliner but nevertheless. It stuck to my skin and I could feel the weight of it around my eyes and I had to get it off. Shit, get it off. I scrubbed at my hands, my face, my eyes, until my skin was red instead of night sky. It was frightening to see a face that was a face that no longer existed. That was it now, that's what I would see in the mirror from now on; not my face, but both of our faces. I was cursed, cursed with the face of my dead twin sister. 

---

I was losing time. 

I'd fall asleep in my own bed; my soft, light, warm bed with it's fluffy pillows and flowery design. But when I woke up, I was always somewhere else; the living room couch, the bathtub, but most of the time, I found myself in Rose's bed, like my subconscious was telling me that I couldn't part, not yet.

Mom and dad didn't know, I didn't want them to know. They didn't need to worry about me when they had everything and more to worry about. Our school was informed immediately, and we received lots of letters and condolences and even a giant card from my year. I barely knew any of them, I bet they didn't even know who they were writing the card for. When I opened it, I spotted Liam's name straight away, in the corner, but in big writing. He wanted me to notice it.

And now, two weeks had passed, and it was time to head back to school.

Fuck.

Thankyou so much for sticking with me to the 9th chapter! I'm sorry it's taken longer than expected, but you know, life gets in the way. If you liked this chapter don't forget to comment/vote and I'll see you in the next one!