I swung open the front door of my house and sighed with relief. I was so glad to be home from a long and frustrating day of school. I threw my bag down by the front door and headed towards the kitchen. I grabbed two bags of dorito's, two soda's throm the fridge and tucked the case of grapes under the pit of my arm. As I pulled a bowl from the dish drainer I stared at my bestfriend, Jacob, through the window. He paced up and down the walkway slowly with a smile. He was talking to his girlfriend again, I could tell because he seemed so at ease but not totally.
That was the problem he didn't look actually comortable. I fumbled for possibilities as I put grapes into the small bowl. I wondered if she was telling him something that made him uneasy. My pondering face was still on when Jacob set foot in the house. I looked up and took in all his nice features. His silky smooth skin, his mesmerizing, brown eyes, lips that would discontinue the existance of pillows, and a bright smile that could blind anyone if they looked too close.
I've always wondered if he ever studied me like I studied him, daydream of me like how I do of him, or even drew small doodles or wrote notes in his own journal
"Why are you looking at me like that?" He said with a small laugh as he sauntered over to where I stood.
"Like what?" I said as I snapped out of my trance.
"I don't know like," He tried to find the right words to put together
"L-like your dreaming or something" He said as he leaned on the island in front of me.
"Jacob, I don't dream, I pursue!" I said playfully playing off that I actually was dreaming. I headed up the staircase with our snacks. Jacob carried the chips and sodas while I carried the bowl of grapes. I entered my blue room and set the grapes on the bed and turned on the TV.
"What to watch, what to watch..." I said as I flipped through channels.
"Ooo! Scooby-Doo!" Jacob's kid side started to come on
"What about Flapjack!" I said in my whiney voice. We both knew we agreed on something as soon as the channel stopped on...
"THE WALKING DEAD!!" Jacob and I called out in unison. I turned around and gave him a fist pound
"My bestfriend has such wonderful taste!" I said as I headed towards my bathroom.
"I know right!!" He said as he popped a grape in his mouth and sat up right on my bed. I closed the bathroom door. Just before I did my business I heard and unhappy grunt emerge from the otherside of the door.
"Blaxican!" I called
"What Chica!? Not my fault your pillows are so damn un-" He cut him self off. It was silent.
"Nevermind Y/N i'm fine..."
"Oh.. Well alright then.." I went on to do my business.
One thing I knew for sure is that he loved "The walking dead" I remember once I was at his house. He was focused on an intense episode. His Mama was calling him for the millionth time and he STILL didn't snap out of it! She was cookin quesadillas at the time. She got so sick and tired she threw a spoon of her secret sauce at him.
"lo mama!? ¡Cómo! Jesucristo! ¡Cómo!" I remember him yelling. His Mama gave him the "Boy who do you think you're talking to!?" look. I had to go home early that day.
I decided to scare him just a bit. I tip-toed over to the bathroom door and slowly opened it. I gasped at the sight before me. Jacob was flipping through my big green and blue journal! The one I basically wrote down all my problems in, and the exact journal I wrote about Jacob in.
"What the hell are you doing!?" I yelled as I raced over to him trying to grab the book from him.
Now I remember!! This morning I put the journal behind my pillows! Jacob must have felt the hard cover through them! Oh god! What if he ends up on the page where I was just being childish and wrote "If your name is Jacob do not lay a finger on this next page!"
"Ooo I'm in Y/N's diary!" Jacob rolled off the other side of the bed and flipped the page.
"Jacob, It's not a diarie, it's a journal, now please I beg you, give it back!" I begged helplessly. It couldn't reach up for it because I was so small. I tried tugging at his shoulders and ears but it was no use!
"Y/N my names in it so I want to read it" It was as if he held the book higher.
"Jake I really don't want you to read tht so-"
"Novemeber 2nd, 2012" He began to read aloud and that's when I lost it. I clawed and clawed trying to get the book out of his reach.
"I don't know what's wrong with me. Feelings for this guy are shooting out of me from every limb! I'm surprised he hasn't picked it up yet that I like him! His milky brown eyes, soft skin a wonderful smile and his hair! Lord his afro is so luscious!" The lst sentence is where he started to quiet down and read in murmurs. All he had to do was push my head away to keep me from interrupting him.
"He is a very, very, close friend of mine. We've been friends since 3rd grade. He treats me as a sister which is nice but i'm afraid i'll always stay in the bestfriend stage. He has somebody already filling in the 'More than that stage' " I stopped struggling and just started to burn imaginery holes in the ground. I prayed that tthey could be real so they could swallow me up into a deep black abyss of nothingness.
The journal entries go all the way up to last night in which I wrot the words "I love Jacob"
I couldn't take anymore. He was still reading the rest of the entry. He already knew it was him I don't know why he was still reading! I ruhed out into the hallway and slammed the door behind me. I went downstairs and sat on my big couch. I tried to regulate my breathing that I hadn't noticed stopped. I curled up into a ball trying to calm my self.
What if he doesn't like me back? What if he stops talking to me? What if he tells people how pathetic I ws to write all that in a stupid journal!? A million more questions filled my head as I sat in my tiny little ball.
"Y/N.." His soft voice filled the air. I didn't raise my head. I was too scared of what was to come.
"Y/N listen to me please?" His smooth manly hands wrapped around my wrists. He pulled them away from my eyes. He got down on both of his knees and said,
"I Love you too Y/N.." It was then I noticed how close his face was to mine. I could smell his minty breath, his cologne, and even his shampoo. He stared into my eyes for what felt like hours. The suddenly flashed towards my lips then back to my eyes. I did the same to him.
In a split second I was kissing the guy of my dreams
I've always thought of what hid lips could taste like I always turned to mint but the real thing was 10 times as better!
When he pulled away he was giving me the same look he was while he was talking on the phone with his girl. But this time he looked,
Complete.
