What I Don't Know Can't Hurt You

Chapter Fourteen

"Hey guys," Ryan said, joining me, Taryn, Leo, and Avery at our lunch table. I leaned over and kissed his cheek.

"Hey," said Taryn, "Quinn told us what happened. Are you okay?"

Ryan shrugged.

"I guess I've been better, but I'm alright."

"Well, now you get to sit with the most popular kids in school," Leo joked. He held up his hand for a high-five. Ryan obliged.

I looked over at Avery's sketchbook. Avery was absentmindedly colouring a heart.

"Hey, Avery, what are your pronouns today?" I asked.

"They/them," Avery replied.

"Oh, are you multiple people today?" asked a voice coming from behind me. I turned around. It was that guy Matt.

"No, just one," they said.

"Well then, I think your pronouns are still she and her," Matt dictated.

"No, cause, see, that would imply that I'm a girl," Avery retorted.

"You are," Matt said, getting mad.

"If I'm a girl, then so are you."

"Hey, that's not fair! You can't just choose my gender for me!"

Leo and I burst out laughing. Avery looked at Matt, astonished by his stupidity.

"That's different," Matt insisted. "I - whatever. Later, fags!"

"I'm straight," Taryn said.

Avery sighed.

"Oh, and Ryan," Matt added, his voice full of sarcasm, "it's too bad you got kicked out of your house. See you at football practice!" He walked away.

Ryan put his head on the table.

"Wow, that really sucked," he declared.

"We know," everyone else said in unison.

"I am so so sorry," he said.

"You don't need to apologize," I said. "It was Matt who was being mean."

"I'm sorry I was ever mean to you," he clarified. "Like, that - ugh."

"I know, it sucks," I comforted him. "I totally know how it feels, but you'll just have to get used to it."

"No one's ever gonna stop being mean," Leo added, "but you can stop caring what they think."

"I guess," Ryan decided.

Taryn sighed.

"I'm literally straight," she said distractedly. "Like, just because I'm friends with gay people doesn't mean I'm gay."

Avery frowned. Taryn looked at them.

"What?"

"Oh, nothing, just, I'm kind of mad," Avery mumbled. "You know, at Matt."

"Okay," Taryn replied suspiciously.

I sat with Ryan on the bus home. At first, he didn't want to sit together because he didn't want anyone to see us, but I reminded him that Matt had probably told everyone already. It didn't exactly cheer him up, but at least we sat together. He had his his arm around me the whole time, and he listened to my music. We didn't talk much.

We got off the bus at the bus stop in our neighbourhood. My dad's house was to the left, but Ryan turned left. I followed him.

He stopped walking.

"This is my house," he said sadly. "Or, at least, it was. I packed my bag last night. I'll go get it."

"Do you want me to come with you, or-"

"No, that's fine."

He opened the door to his house and closed it behind him. I stood on the sidewalk. I watched as a tear fell from my cheek onto the sidewalk. This must have been awful for him.

Ryan came back out with a duffel bag slung over his shoulders. He slammed the door and joined me on the sidewalk.

"I got my bag," he mumbled. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to stop himself from crying.

"Are you okay?" I asked. What a stupid question. Of course he wasn't okay!

"No." He sat down on the curb. I took a seat next to him and put my arm around him. He leaned his head into my shoulder. "Why couldn't I just be normal? I should have hid it better. I should have dated Evelyn or something. "

"No, don't say that! I really like you," I protested.

"I know," he said, starting to cry. Tears streamed down his face.

"It's going to be okay," I said.

"No it's not! I hate this. I hate all of this. Fuck!"

"Hey, hey, shhh."

I pressed my lips to his forehead. He sniffed and rubbed his eyes.

"Should we go to my house now? My dad's probably wondering where I am."

"Okay."

"Here, I'll take your bag."

The walk to my house wasn't very far, but it seemed to take forever. Ryan's bag was heavy, and I was nervous about my dad letting Ryan stay. I was pretty sure he would be fine with it, but a part of me worried that we wouldn't be okay with letting my boyfriend sleep over.

Ryan had calmed down by the time we walked up to my front door, but his eyes were still a little red. I took his hand and squeezed it.

"You ready?"

He nodded. I turned the doorknob and pushed open the door.

"Hey, dad!" I called. I pulled Ryan inside and set his duffel bag on the floor.

"Hey, Quinn," he replied, emerging from the living room. "And, um, hey, whoever this is." He looked at Ryan curiously.

"Oh, um, this is my, um, boyfriend Ryan," I explained nervously. "He got kicked out of his house. Is it okay if he stays here for a bit?"

Ryan waved shyly.

"Hi, Mr. Coleman," he said politely.

"Hello, Ryan. How long do you plan on staying here?"

"I don't really know, unless my parents let me come back, I don't really have any other places to stay."

"I see. Well, why don't you go put your stuff in Quinn's room and I'll get the guest room ready."

Ryan smiled.

"Thank you so much."

I tried to pick Ryan's bag up off the floor.

"It's fine, I'll carry it." He lifted it onto his shoulder with ease. I led him up the stairs.

"Just leave it here for now," I said, gesturing to a corner of my room. He set it down carefully and turned around to face me.

"Hey, roomie," I joked.

"You're such a dork," he laughed, leaning in to kiss me.

"Thanks," I smiled.

Who would have thought Ryan Patterson would be staying in my house?