Rather Be (A Camren Story)

Chapter 23

I laid my head back on Camila's shoulder while she fiddled with my fingers. It felt nice to be able to take a minute and relax with the person that keeps my heart beating. I missed this part the most about our relationship.

"You're awfully quiet," Camila spoke up, breaking the silence. "What are you thinking about, baby?"

"The better days," I replied, looking up at her breathtaking beauty.

"These days haven't been good?" She questioned.

"No, they have been," I reassured her. "But do you ever wish we could go back in time when are biggest worry was making sure we put the twins diapers on the right way?"

"Those were terrible days," she giggled.

"Maybe because you didn't secure Ash's diaper on correctly and woke up to a blowout," I laughed at the memory.

Camila spent the entire morning getting Ashtyn bathed and the crib cleaned.

"Don't act all innocent. You've had a fair share of diaper misshapes," she stated. "Don't you remember the time Kay popped on your mom's wall?"

"That wasn't my fault," I protested. "I was just trying to change her diaper."

"The twins were kind of like our guinea pigs. You know what I mean?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "We're first time moms just trying to figure everything out."

"Exactly," she said, pressing her soft lips against my head.

"I've been thinking about something though," she went on moments later.

"What have you've been thinking about, baby?" I question.

"What you would look like with another baby in your arms," she stated, breaking her hand away from mine.

"Camz, I thought you weren't ready to become pregnant," I replied.

"I wasn't," she started as she traces tiny circles on my abdomen with her finger tip. "But I've thought it out and came to the conclusion of what am I really afraid of?"

"We're both financially stable and after the Christmas we'll be able to accommodate our schedules for a new human being," she went on.

"Don't you think we're rushing things?" I questioned.

"You think we're rushing things?" She asked.

"Camila, we've just got back together, what? A month ago? I think we both need to work on this relationship before we go adding more kids into the mix."

"I guess," she mumbled just loud enough for me to hear.

"I still want to expand our family, Camz," I reassured her, reconnecting our hands. "I just don't think now is the best time."

"You're right," she said, rubbing my thumb with hers.

We sat in silence for a little longer before Camila's sweet voice filled the room. "Lauren?"

"Hm?"

"I want to ask you something but I don't want you to explode."

"I'm not going to explode, Camz," I reassured.

"You promise?"

"I promise, baby girl," I said before kissing the top of her hand.

"What were your intentions with Keana?" She asked carefully.

"My intentions?"

"Yeah," she confirmed. "Did you ever envision yourself marrying her or having a family with her?"