The Spinster's Club

ROMY: SIX

A couple of days after 'tattoogate', I couldn't help but notice how sore the location of the offending art was. Sitting in a chair for any length of time only seemed to aggravate the spot on my bum where the tattoo now resided and after taking a look at it in the mirror I could see why.

A good three inches of skin around the tattoo itself was inflamed, the skin redder than the dye used to color the flag; it also hurt like a sonofabitch to touch. Clearly I needed to see a doctor so twenty minutes later I found myself in Doc Carter's office, explaining how I managed to get myself into trouble; this time.

"...and so that's how I ended up with a tattoo I didn't want. Or at the very least, what Amy led me to believe. She was as drunk as me so it could all have been just what she hoped happened."

The doctor was doing his level best not to laugh and he was succeeding; mostly. "Romy, you really need to stop drinking, at least in excess. Apart from giving your liver a break, you will be less inclined to do things that end up bringing you into see me."

"That's easy for you to say Doc; you don't know my friends."

He gave me a sympathetic smile. "Maybe I need to have you all come in so I can give you a talk on the hazards of drinking too much."

The very idea actually made me laugh. "If I didn't think Amy or Cass would try and talk you into joining us, I'd probably take you up on the offer." He laughed. "In all seriousness, do you think the scar will be horrendous if I get it removed? At this point I'd prefer the scar to the Swiss flag."

Scribbling something onto his prescription pad, he replied "It's not a real tattoo Romy. My guess is the ink is simply dyed henna. It will eventually fade away completely, although I dare say it will be a good couple of weeks before that starts to happen. The guy went a little overboard on the fill-in."

"If it's not real then why I am in so much pain? And the swelling..."

"I'm pretty confident it's just an allergic reaction to either the henna or whatever he used to color it." Handing me the script he continued "That's for an anti-inflammatory cream. Use it twice a day for a week. If it gets worse or the swelling hasn't gone in that time, come back and see me."

The relief I felt was enormous. "If you weren't a happily married man, I could kiss you right now."

To my embarrassment he answered "If I wasn't a happily married man, I'd let you." He then gave me a wink. I couldn't leave his office fast enough.

Amy wasn't answering her phone when I tried to call her with the good news so I left a message to let her know the tattoo wasn't real. I also said something unladylike along the lines of her going on her own if she wanted to get a real one; drunk or not, I had learnt my lesson.

~*~*~

A few days after the doctor's visit, the swelling had started to go down and the tenderness was also dissipating. It was finally at a point where unless I knocked the affected area, I could almost forget the tattoo was even there. Now that I had no overt discomfort to distract me I was able to focus on other things; like my store.

I had put in an order for the equipment I was going to need but that was still a good two or three weeks from being delivered. As I wanted to put a fresh coat of paint on the walls and add a few other touches besides, having no equipment in the way was my best opportunity to do that. The store itself wasn't overly huge but the painting was going to be a big job and so I had organized for some help in the form of Rachel, who had been my assistant when I worked for Millie.

"I'm happy you called me Romy. I was hoping you were going to start your own place and now here you are. I don't suppose when you finally open you'll need help then too?"

I smiled. "I'm sure I will. I was going to talk to you about it a little closer to when I open but now that you've brought it up, what do you say? You're still at Uni, right?"

"Yeah but I can offer you the same hours I gave Millie; at least until the end of the semester and then I can come in full time if you need me. I'm happy to work the shop but I'm also hoping to learn some of the creative side of things as well."

Knowing how much she had been a help to me previously, this was a no-brainer. "I'm happy to teach you all I can. The way things are going the store won't be quite up to open status for at least a month; that's allowing for the finishing of the outfit and then making enough goodies to actually sell. I can probably show you a few things in that time and not have to worry about you being out front serving."

"Awesome. I can't wait. Thanks Romy, you're the best."

"You're welcome" I answered simply, happy to have at least made one person's day.

~*~*~

The following night I found myself at Midvale Middle School, ready to take an art class. It had been suggested by Rachel that I take it, when I had joked about not being able to draw a straight stick figure. I wanted to paint something cool on the feature wall of the store and had no idea where to start. I did ask Rachel if she could do it but she begged off, saying she was worse than me when it came to art.

Seemingly her mom had taken the class and enjoyed it and so I figured why not. I might not be able to do my own mural at the end of it all but it was a chance to get out and meet new people and it kept me from drinking – it was a win win as far as I could tell.

It was also a win in another way. When trying to think of something to do as my new hobby as part of the pact, art hadn't been the first thing to come to mind. Jumping from a perfectly fine plane that wasn't about to crash, or strapping on an oversized elastic band around my ankles, before throwing myself off a bridge were never going to be options. I did briefly consider learning to surf but that was laughable at best – putting myself into a wetsuit and walking into the ocean would be like carrying a sign that says 'dinner is served, sharks eat free', because I'd look like a big juicy seal.

Fear of public speaking and being tone deaf also meant that trying out for the local theatre group was out, although I really would have loved to have played 'Columbia' in the Midvale theatre company's production of Rocky Horror show. The girls would probably laugh at me and tell me that art wasn't exciting enough to count but I didn't care. It was new and exciting for me and that was all that mattered.

~*~*~

Walking into the classroom, I was happy to note that of the other people already there, I wasn't the only one over the age of 25 years attending. If anything, the class seemed to be made up mostly of older women, with only two guys that I could see. There were a couple of girls who may have been mid 20's but the rest of us were my age, if not older.

Julian; the teacher I had spoken to over the phone about attending; helped set me up at a work space before having me fill out some paperwork as we all waited for the model who was yet to show up. Turns out the class had moved on from fruit and were now focusing on the human form. Considering the way I butchered the humble stick figure, this was going to be one interesting class.

I had no sooner finished with the paperwork when Julian addressed the class. "Sorry everyone but it looks like we will have to cancel tonight's class. Stefan just called to say he can't make it and it's too late to organize a replacement. I know some of you were eager to start but we will have to take it up next week."

Before I could stop them, the words were tumbling out of my mouth. "I can model, if you like. I've never done it before but I'm willing to try. I'm not really an artist anyway so I don't mind helping out the rest of the class."

There were murmurs of appreciation and a few other things I couldn't quite make out as Julian gave me a raised eyebrow. "Are you sure Romy? This was to be your first class after all. Please don't feel like you have to do this."

"Oh, it's fine, really. It will give me a chance to watch the others and get a feel for the class. Unless you would rather I didn't?"

"No no, not at all; it would be great if you could do this for us." A moment later he added "Ok, if you will just follow me, I'll show you where you can undress."

~*~*~

Undress; what the fuck?! He wasn't serious. I had only volunteered because I thought all I would have to do is sit on a stool and look wistfully off into space. It never occurred to me when he said life-form on the phone, what he actually meant was naked life-form.

I stood there, not sure I could move. I had just offered to help and yet I wanted nothing more than to flee the room. I so desperately wanted to take back my offer and yet I couldn't do that either. Once again my big mouth had put me in a bad situation and I hadn't even been drinking. This so wasn't happening to me.

"Romy?" Julian asked once he realized I wasn't following him. "Is everything ok?"

It wasn't but I could hardly say that. I suppose I could have told him I had changed my mind because I hadn't realized I would have to be naked, but that was just a cop out. The only way I could go through with this was by focusing on the fact that I didn't know anyone here and I was never going to see them again; especially if I never came back.

"It's fine. Sorry; I guess I'm just nervous. I've never been naked in a room full of strangers before, unless you count the delivery room I was born in."

He laughed. "If it makes you uncomfortable you don't need to do this. The class will understand. We can all just come back next week."

I sighed. "No, I offered; let's do this."

He gave me an empathetic smile and led me behind a curtained off area where I could undress. I wanted to throw up.

~*~*~

Flushing several shades of embarrassed to rival the reds on the palettes of the students, I kept my head down as I headed back out into the room and then allowed myself to be posed on the table at the front of the class. Thankfully I wasn't completely naked, a sheet had been draped over my lap and I was asked to hold up a corner so that only a third of my right breast was showing. My back and butt, which were facing the room, were completely uncovered however but given I was twisted slightly so they could see some of me in profile, it wasn't like I was just flashing them.

As the class began I sat there and stared at the literary figures posters on the wall, all the while wondering how I always managed to get myself into these things. I often blamed Amy or one of the other girls but as it turned out, I was more than capable of getting myself into just as much trouble without them. 'This is what comes of trying to help people' I thought to myself sourly.

The one saving grace was that none of the girls were here to see my shame and unlike the stripper mix-up with David, I was never going to tell them about this; ever. Not even for words of advice on how to overcome the embarrassment. As far as they're concerned, tonight I was at the movies watching some Matt Damon thriller.

By the time the hour was up, I was a little stiff and had pins and needles in my left leg because of the way I had been seated. I did have to admit to feeling quite proud of myself for having gone through with it, even if I was the only one who was going to know. You could only imagine then how my mortification levels jumped off the chart when I turned to get off the table and literally bumped into David who was standing there, paint brush in hand and a huge shit-eating grin on his face.

~*~*~