Break down my walls

Break-downs & Escapes

Clary's POV
What the hell? Isabelle just took Jace I to the kitchen, and he looked absolutely wretched. His wrist was swollen, his jaw slack, dried blood on his nose and the corner of his mouth, and a glass shard in his upper left arm," I'm fine izzy. I'm fine!" He slightly slurred. Isabelle stated at him."fine? You are not fine!" She screeched.
Alec had stepped in then, and Jace said," Alec! See? I'm fine righty? Yeah. I ffine." He slurred. Alec froze Isabelle just stood there like before, her expression unchanging. Alec on the other hand, looked furious," your drunk? What the hell Jace?!" Alec yelled. Oh....that's why his words were slurring.
There was a rapid knock in the door, an Jace went for it, followed swiftly by Alec and Isabelle, and I had no real choice but to follow. I stayed not far behind, and Jace opened the door. An oldish guy was standing In The doorway, a sling around his arm, his face bloody. Luke was standing next to him, looking exasperated. Luke? What the hell? "Jace. Apologize. Now." Was all Luke said. "What happened?" Isabelle said. "Jace?" Rang Alec's voice, becoming protective. Jace sighed," not saying sorry. He's the one who put the glass in my arm, so I broke his. He got lucky." Jace said. Luke put his head down." Jace. Please. Just do it. " Luke said frustrated. "Fine. I'm so sorry I didn't shatter every bone in your arm instead. I really should have been more violent." Jace said dryly. This was the Most I've heard him talk in a long time.
"Jace!" Luke hissed. Liam trotted up behind him, a jacket in his hand," hey Luke. Hey big scary guy. Jace you forgot your jacket in my car." Liam informed, and handed Jace the jacket. Jace took it. "What's goin on?" Liam asked. "Trying to get this bastard to apologize for breaking his arm." Luke said, indicating the guy beside him. Liam laughed. Actually laughed." It could have been a lot worse buddy. Believe me, when Jace was 13 he flipped me over, and then broke my wrist. I was 3x his size. Could. Have. Been. Worse. " Liam said. Jace looked down. "I said I was sorry about that Lima." Jace said quietly." And my pinky finger isn't straight because of the little bastard. He broke it when he was 12. Wonderful isn't it?" Liam joked. Luke stared at Liam.
Lima? Like the bean? What the hell?
I thought. Jace looked up, and then back down, and I knew he was back again, the Jace that was always in a shell, keeping his feeling locked away, and was silent. Liam sighed, and Luke gave up, taking the guy away. Isabelle closed the door, and turned to Jace,"what happened?" She said sharply. Jace shrugged.
Yup, Mr.silence is back.

Jace's POV

•Flashback•

I screamed. "Jace, please! Stop screaming, okay, I know it hurts, just please stop screwing." Katie begged. She was currently trying to get Fragments of cloth from the whip wounds across my back. Of they stayed there, the wounds could get infected, and then it would be even more painful. Katie cursed as I screamed again, crying softly. "Hey, come on Jace, you can do it okay? Just a little longer bud." Liam encouraged, squeezing my hand softly. Katie went for another wound, a deeper one, and she went a little to deep, and I couldn't even make a sound anymore. I couldn't scream, or even cry. "Jace?" It sounded distant. But it was clearly Katie. "Jace!" Liam. "Jace are you okay?" Liam again.
"Jesus what did I do?" Katie. I closed my eyes, absorbing the pain. It was white hot, blistering, stabbing pain. I opened my eyes again. "Just-finish it. Now." I managed. I felt Katie hesitate before going into the wound again, but I didn't scream. Not once again. "Done. Jace it's done." Came Katie's voice, I want sure how long It had taken. But all I felt was the pain, and I could'nt cry out. I nodded. My head fell to the table, where there was a dirty cloth for my head. I passed out then, from exhaustion and pain.

•flashback over•

I shrugged. I didn't want to talk about anything anymore, and that feeling of wanting nothing more than peace and quiet came back like a crushing wave you hadn't seen coming, drowning you.
I walked away silently, making no sound as I walked across the floorboards. I could practically feel Isabelle's glare on me.
Up the stairs, and into my room. I close the door quietly. I glance around my room, grabbing a leather jacket from my closet, and open the window. I glance down, eyeing the cement below, My room was 2 stories high, but it didn't frighten me. I swiftly climbed out onto the small ledge, took a deep breath, and jumped.
Clary's POV
I watched as Jace walked silently across the room, and up the stairwell. "Well, that just happened." I said."Yeah, I guess it did." Isabelle replied, sounding slightly sad. She grabbed my wrist, and took me back into the kitchen, where the dinner we had been eating had grown cold.

2 hours later

I sat in the living room with izzy, we had been watching a chick flick, which had been insisted upon by izzy. She had fallen asleep, silently. I yawned as Alec walked in, looking worried, alert and scared,"wake up izzy. Now" he sounded frantic. I obliged, shaking izzy to wake her. Her eyelids fluttered, and then opened," what do want Alec?" She groaned groggily. "Jace is missing. He's not in his room." Alec said quickly. At this, izzy perked up," what do you mean missing?" She yelled. "He's not not in his room, no where in the house. No where." Alec said frustratedly.

Jace's POV
I landed swiftly onto the hard cement, the soles of my shoes clicking as they touched the floor. I breathed, then took off running. It was the one place that I went to, to relieve my pain, the only place that really made me happy. About a mile away, I stopped at the shed. I pulled the key from my pocket, and opened the door. I stepped into the cold air. I locked the door, flicking on the lamp-light. On the table there lay small knives and razor blades of different varieties. I walked over to the table, only glancing at the piano in the corner of the room before picking up a small knife. I rolled up the sleeves of my shirt, shrugging off the jacket that now lay on the floor. I smiled slightly as the blade glided across my inner arm. Relieving my pain, like a cold fresh breeze on a hot summer day. Different parts of my arms, always inner. This was the one kind of pain that never really hurt. I started cutting about 2 years ago. It was the only thing that really eased me. I sank into the metal chair beside the table, blood dripping down my arms. I closed my eyes, absorbing the joyful pain.
Clary's POV
Isabelle started freaking out, and she had called the police. They were at the door now, interrogating Isabelle and Alec. Jace trotted down the stairs, and froze at the cops. "Jace!" I yelled, Isabelle and Alec whipped around. "Hey." Jace said, and he looked surprisingly pale. A medic from the squad rushed over to him," are you alright? You look awfully pale." She said worriedly. "He always looks like that on weekends." Alec said quickly. Jace just looked around "what's going on?" He asked," you were gone! We called the police. Where were you?!" Isabelle demanded. Jace blinked," out." He gulped. The paramedic was examining him, checking for injuries, she went to grab his shirt cuffs, when his other hand stopped her," I'm fine." He said sternly. She shook her head and took him Into another room.
Jace's POV
Shit.
If this 'doctor' lady finds my cuts she'll tell the LightWoods. They can't know about this.
She sits me down in a chair," where were you?" She questions. I shrugged. She advanced on me, pulling up my sleeves before I could stop her, and she goes cold. She stands there, looking down at my arms, slightly bleeding, but freshly cut. "When? When did this start?" She whispers. "2 years ago..." I reply in a hushed tone. She nodded,"does your family know?" I shook my head. "I'm sorry. Why? Why do you do this?" She said sounding strained. I shrugged," it feels good. Relieves the pain...." I said after a while. A tear ran down her pale face,"does it really help you? Really help?" She said anxiously. I nodded. "Okay. Go." Then she pulled the sleeve down, and I nearly ran from her.
Clary's POV
The police all left after a while, and Jace was sitting on the couch. Isabelle marched into the room," where were you?!" She screamed at Jace."out." Was all he said," that's not good enough! Your always 'out' Jace!! What do you do?! When your gone, what do you so?!" Isabelle screamed at him. He muttered something, but I only caught parts of it,"...knives.....shed.....music.....relief....can't stop..." Isabelle hasn't picked up on it. Isabelle was fuming, and Jace stood from his seat on the leather couch, trampling up the stairs.