tyler didn't intend to cry.
he didn't mean to sob into his pillow.
he most certainly didn't mean to block out his mothers worried calls.
but the thoughts had come upon him again.
how he's never gonna erase her from his life. no matter what, he was still trapped.
no matter how many operations, changes, hormone infused pills and needles.
he hated himself, he sometimes just wanted to vomit at his own reflection.
he got up, & shuffled over to the mirror. he threw his shirt to the side and just looked at himself.
the scars that were imprinted on his chest, he felt he looked weird. he traced the scars, following the scars tracks.
tyler couldn't stand his reflection; it only reflected how he felt on the inside.
out of nowhere, tyler punched the mirror. a shriek coming from his mouth and a stinging sensation flowing through his hand.
shards dropped to the floor; the mirror still cracking and breaking apart.
Tyler backed up against the wall, sliding down and cradling his injured hand in the other.
he sobbed violently; his body shaking with every sob emitting from his mouth.
Tyler's door was thrown open and a frantic mr. joseph looking for his son.
once he saw tyler, he had to use everything to not cry.
"t-tyler? why did you do this?" his father stuttered, taking in the scene of the bathroom.
"I fucking hate myself; all I see in the mirror is a sad excuse of life. I'll never be a boy; I can't. all I see is her no matter how I try to avoid it, I still do. and it hurts, it hurts so fucking much to know that I'll never be who I feel I am. dad, you just don't understand. and I wish you could, I do." tyler cried, looking his father in the eyes.
mr. joseph got down on the floor and put his arms around his son.
"I may not understand tyler, but I love you. & I want to understand. I believe you are my son, the best son I could ever have. it brings me joy to have you as my child, I feel so blessed, ty. You are an intelligent and handsome young man, & don't you ever doubt that. okay?" tyler put his head in his fathers shoulder and held him tight.
"I love you dad" tyler said, sniffling a bit.
"I love you too, tyler." a stray tear slid down the mans face as he held his so closer.
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tyler's father ended up cleaning his bathroom & his injured hand. his mother helped bandage him up as well.
she muttered 'I love you' and kissed his forehead softly. after she was done tending to his hand, she embraced him in a hug.
"you're my one and only son, & I'm so proud I have the title of being your mother, tyler. you are wonderful young man, okay?" tyler nodded and smiled ever so slightly.
that day he spent the evening with his parents. smiling, laughing, & joking around.
he knew he was with people who love him & accept him for who he is.
& he couldn't be happier.
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update for y'all,
hope you liked it.
Kinda had me teared up.
I love y'all, & have a good day/night 💘
